


Fuck this shit!

by BrightestOfCrayons



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Action/Adventure, Adult Content, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Awkward Flirting, Blood and Gore, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Angst, Inappropriate Humor, Multi, Silly Dumbledore trix are for kids, Slow Burn, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2018-10-27 17:24:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 24
Words: 42,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10813458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrightestOfCrayons/pseuds/BrightestOfCrayons
Summary: Mandy Mathews had been dying her hair a delightful shade of raven black while listening to her Van Halen mixtape when she got a little too into the song 'Why can't this be love'. she was really singing into that comb, to the point she hadn't quite noticed the bottle of black hair solution she knocked over with her elbow. it started to drip on the floor, turning into a small dark puddle by her foot. she slipped on it, cracking her head open on the sharp edge of the sink. blood gushed out of her skull, as she died on the bathroom floor, dramatically towards the end of the song too, which strangely satisfied her Ocd. her last regret in life was that she couldn't go to the movies to see the newest Harry Potter film with her friends. she was going to be cosplaying as Harry Potter himself too! but who needed to cosplay when she woke up as the real thing, in the body of a much younger Harry underneath the cupboard? ****NOTICE: I'm going to be adding more/rewriting some of the previous chapters without changing much of anything plot-wise. New chapters will come in time, can't promise when because life has been sucking for me lately and is more important than a fic.****





	1. Bring it!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting da ball rolling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll often come back and reword things or add pieces here and there. make it spiffier. make corrections. Oh, and I'm using the characters models from the movie instead of the book If anyone is curious about the image of each character. Though Harry's eyes will be green instead of blue, and Neville will be blonde as described in the book. A few little tidbits on the others appearances will migrate from the book too. The fic is based off both the book and movie, like a big ol family bag of Chex mix. Delicious!

Mandy shot up from her sleep in a cold sweat, her head meeting wood. The harsh impact forced her back down with a grimace, as she rolled on her side, cradling her aching skull. A light cover, which felt a lot like burlap slid off her body. Tears gathered in the ducts of her eyes and the strong smell of a dirty mattress, sweat, and feet around her were not helping, as well as the lumpy surface where she lay."Ow.." She croaked, sounding much frailer than she's ever heard herself before. She wondered where she was and would have loved to have figured that out, alas, she couldn't. Mandy's vision was shot to shit. She reasoned it was because she hit her head on the sink in her bathroom, resulting in a nasty concussion. But the last time she checked, her bathroom did not smell like a dirty high school locker room. Her bathroom smelled of various fruits and occasionally a deliciously smelling cucumber melon candle she lit a short while after her significant other dropped a load in her toilet.  _I shoulder really buy some Poo-Pourri._ She mused, groaning when a loud and very sudden slam disrupted her from her thoughts. The noise it made went through her head like a nail, metaphorically, of course. It also caused actual dust and sawdust from the narrowed corners of the walls to fall all around her. Mandy gasped, having been startled and jumped, hitting her wrist against the wall. She winced, knowing it would surely bruise. A shrill woman's voice could be heard from outside of what she would soon find out was an enclosed space. "Be quiet, you freak!" It had Mandy seething as she silently thought. _W_ _ho the fuck does this bitch think she is?!  
_

 

"How about you make me bitch!" The crone, Mandy guessed, based solely on the tone of this awful old voice, choked on her spit, making an undignified noise that sounded similar to a dying cat. Mandy hoped whoever it was keeled over because she heard deep coughing. Heavy footsteps rattled the ground, irritating her aching head further. Whoever it was, they were getting closer. Her face was hot, and she could hear the beat of her own heart in her ears, thumping, and unpleasantly so. After a few seconds, metal clanking against its neighboring plates drowned out the sound of her heartbeat from how close it was to the side of her head. It echoed throughout the small enclosure. _A lock? did this bitch lock me in here?_ Mandy was already having enough trouble trying to comprehend what was happening around her, the locks only puzzled her further and before she could even guess what was going on, the harsh exposure to a light hit her square in the face like a sharp lingering pain in her neck. Only it was flashing across her eyes, ceasing any further thoughts on the matter. 

 

She couldn't really think or bring herself to do much of anything other than shutting her eyes tightly with a wince, as a tight grip found its way around her throat and yanked her out of what she'd later find out was a small cupboard under some stairs. What was perhaps the most disturbing part about it was that this monstrous crone slugged her up and out like she didn't weigh anything at all, was it even the crone? A mute burly accomplice?  Mandy couldn't tell, her vision still one big blur, though she could make out the shapes of various furnishings and then the unclear but solid outline of the giant who hauled her out of wherever she was. It was hard adjusting to the light while trying not to choke on the hand around your neck, all while pulling yourself up on the wrist which held you up so your neck wouldn't snap should you let go. This beast must have been gigantic! Mandy's toes hardly grazed what felt like wooden floorboards beneath her bare toes. The light, and now the tightening grip around her throat added further irritation to her sensitive eyes. Her eyes shouldn't be this sensitive either! The most sensitive they've ever been is when she woke up with the blinds open in front of her bed after a night of intense bar hopping the day after her thirteenth birthday and shown brightly in them. _I must have hit my head really hard!_ and that thought was almost enough to take her mind off of how she could no longer breathe. Almost. The muscles in her throat, however, forced her to pay attention to what was happening while it fought and flexed for air. Mandy panicked the moment she could no longer feel wood beneath her, now hovering face to face with what had to be a woman if the slight scent of perfume was anything to go by, but hey, maybe it was it was a guy? She wouldn't know, she was too progressive to assume, bra. "How dare you talk to me that way! After I took you into my home out of the goodness of my heart! Just you wait until your uncle Vernon gets home!" The crone grit out through clenched teeth. _Ok, so it's not only a woman but a giant old crone who was probably a linebacker for her school back in the day. This amount of_ strenght _is unnatural!_

 

Mandy didn't think her vision could muck up much further, but it did. She was starting to see black dots, her circulation was being cut off she realized. Mandy started to kick and gag, trying to find her footing. She was terrified, but her thoughts on how she had to escape this beast's grasp were stronger than her fear. Seriously, this was the worst day ever. First, she hits her head, wakes up in a dark smelly locked room? With a nasty concussion, and she can't bloody see! The cherry topper was some insane giant older lady currently strangling her. She needed to end this before such large hands befitting an ogre crushed her windpipe, she didn't spend fifteen years studying Chinese acupuncture and the human body for nothing! It was a risk, to hang loosely by her neck, but one she was willing to take at this point. Almost. She kicked and struggled enough that the very tips of her toes touched the ground, when she brought her fingers down hard, making a rough jab at this woman's forearms in just the right places. As expected, both fell limp causing the woman to cry out in shock, releasing her hold on Mandy. Mandy's world spun, the palms of her feet soon meeting the floor, then the rest of her as she fell on her ass, gasping for air. The blurry outline of the giant woman fell to her knees, going into a fit of hysterics. 

 

Mandy coughed, wheezed whilst blearily rising to her feet.. Her throat was incredibly sore and she sort of felt like one of those victimized characters in an outlast video game. Out of the corner of her eye, she spots something shimmering under the light of what was a ceiling fan? Two, small glass circles sat upright back in the dark hole she was dragged from. In each piece of glass, was it somewhat clear on the other side. With the woman distracted, Mandy rushed to pluck them from the ground and put them on. _My_ _god, I can see! C_ rawling out of what appeared to be a cupboard under the stairs, albeit shakily, she froze once ducking out from under the frame at the sight of her attacker. "No fucking way..." The woman crying hysterically, now positioned on her side laying on the ground looked an awful lot like Petunia, horse-faced mother fucking Dursley!

 

Which meant that no one broke into Mandy's house and threw her in the closet to rob her blind or some equally as strange hostage situation. The woman before her wasn't a giant either, though maybe she was... Mandy wasn't sure, but what she was sure of was that she isn't dreaming. The pain inflicted on her person was and felt very real. Mandy felt sick and threw up all over the woman's neatly done hair, which made the crone cry out even louder and throw up on herself, and all over the carpet too. Mandy threw up again from the unnatural empty feeling in her stomach, the wave of adrenaline long gone. The world seemed to spin. "What kind of nightmare have I arrived in?"Mandy rasped, wiping what looked like blood off the back of her mouth with an oversized sleeve. Petunia wasn't making things any easier with her ugly, loud hyena cries. Mandy wasn't going to leave this dangerous woman with just a pair of limp arms, it was too risky. She brought down her fingers again in a series of harsh jabs against her attacker, ignoring the woman's pleading for Mandy to stop. The woman would not be able to move for a very long time after Mandy was done with her, falling back on her ass again as she panted from fatigue. This woman was now rendered motionless like a Marinette doll that's strings were snipped. "Shut up, I can't fucking think!" Mandy rasped out painfully. Petunia's mouth snapped shut, appearing frightened at her, as she lay in vomit. A bloody chunk falling from the crone's hair, and into the tear duct of Petunia's left, shut, eye.

 

Mandy felt extremely weak as if she'd taken two caps full of Miralax for a week, not that she ever did that... Ok she did, the point is her body felt extremely malnourished. _Just how long was I out!?! How long was I under those fucking stairs!?!_ She thought, Shakily making her way down the corridor, using the side of the wall for support. Even then, pushing down on the side of the wall with her hands was a struggle and she eventually had to rely on her shoulder. She passed a mirror on the opposing side of the wall. Her reflection downright terrified her. "No..No..nonononono." The world started to spin harder, as she slid down the wall with a thump, no longer able to walk on her own. "This can't be.." She whimpered, bringing her hand up to the new bruise on her neck the shape of a handprint, or rather, Harry Potter's neck. It felt like an eternity, but Mandy's jade green eyes never left the mirror, as she stared at who she's somehow become. A thought struck her, bringing her hand down from her throat to the crotch of her oversized jeans. Her eyebrows disappeared into her hairline, ripping her hand away as if she were burned and exhausting herself in the process. _And I have a penis!_ She was alarmed, or rather he was alarmed. _It wasn't a giant in there after all._ "I shrunk!" Harry croaked. The sound of a door creaked open, peaking Mandy's interest to glance over at where it had come from. She didn't have time to ponder who it might have been, and didn't really have to. The enraged shout gave the identity of this stranger away immediately."HARRY!" Vernon.. "Eat a dick!" Mandy or rather Harry managed to shout back, sounding just about as angry as the fat man.


	2. Calm before the storm.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vernon arrives home from work late into the evening and shit gets a little scary for our main protagonist. Whatever you do Harry, don't make it worse for yourself! "I'll do what I want, mate!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just got done with outlast two and it's giving me ideas. The next chapter will be crazy.

Harry cursed silently to himself, he really didn't mean to say that aloud. _Ok, I did but only because the fat grotesque bastard could devour his own testicles! Well as far as I'm concerned._ Young Harry didn't realize just how long he had been looking at his new reflection either. Hours had to have passed...It was a pretty common occurrence for Mandy to just drift off into thought like this. It was something she started to do during her early childhood when she was left alone with her thoughts.

 

It was crazy how much time had passed! The sun had lowered to the point it coated the house and all it can reach from inside, a dark calming shade of beautiful sherbert. Shadows grew and stretched at lopsided angles under the legs and sides of furniture, frames hanging on the walls...Mostly family portraits belonging to the Dursleys, minus young Harry being in any of them of course. He wanted so desperately to seek out time for himself, process everything that happened a little bit more, maybe figure out why...But fate wasn't always kind, like today for example, but he'd make time and would be damned if he'd spent it in the cupboard under the stairs! Vernon had stomped upstairs, shouting after him, giving Harry the impression that the fat man thought Harry was up there. It also meant his Aunt couldn't move her neck to see which way he left her, which meant he pushed more pressure points and harder than he thought he did.

 

It couldn't be helped, he was scared when he did it. _The feeling should come back in a day or two.. maybe..._ Or so he thought with a wry smile. _Ok, time to move._ Harry attempted to shove himself off the floor, falling back down helplessly but not noisily, luckily. Gritting his teeth, he tried again, succeeding this time. His legs threatened to buckle beneath him, as he was unused to feeling so weak but he had to get moving while he still could, even if everything ached. His neck more than the rest of him. _Move.. move, move move move!_ Came his internal screams, a flurry of black dots exploding in his peripheral vision as he limped along the corridor, a loud ring blaring in his ears. A ring which reminded him of those old war movies where soldiers missed the opportunity to take cover behind a wall or in a shelter of some sorts, their ears drums being abruptly damaged from being too close to the blast of an active grenade. He was just too malnourished, thin and injured to move much faster than he was currently. It wasn't a good combination and made one hell of a fatigued cocktail.

 

Quickly, he made his way into a door close by, his trembling fingers moving quickly to open it and as silently as he could in his current condition. He all but fell inside, moving to lock the door behind him, every bit aware of the thundering footsteps coming from upstairs, along with the shouting. "Where are you hiding you ungrateful brat!? You will show yourself this instant! I will make you pay for hurting my beautiful wife!" Harry double checked the locked door, a bad idea. Trying to focus his eyes on anything so quickly made his eyeballs hurt. He lost his balance again, feeling nauseous, luckily nothing came out...There was just nothing left to throw up. Slumping against the wall, his shoulder knocked against it hard enough to make a slight racket. He cursed under his breath at the sound, hoping it had gone unheard. "He's downstairs, I heard a noise coming from downstairs!" Screeched Petunia. _Shit!_ Vernon's footsteps were growing heavier, and Harry really really didn't want to get caught. He looked around the room, hoping he could find some way out.

 

The window was too small for him to fit through, and too high up but the vent on the side of the wall was wide and square. if he could somehow unscrew the sides, and get in there he could hide inside the foundation of the house, probably. When Vernon reached the bottom of the stairs, Harry looked around frantically for anything to get the screws off their hinges. There was nothing. Not even a coin. But as if magic, accidental magic to be more precise, had the screws slowly started coming out of the wall. Harry prayed to whatever gods were out there that it would hurry. _Please please hurry!_ His body was shaking. Vernon opened one of the doors in the hallway, right next to the bathroom he was in. Harry hadn't the foggiest idea as to what could have been inside, but what sounded like a broom fell out and clattered on the ground, which made Harry's heart nearly beat right out of his chest. Vernon was waaay too close! The burly man was making a ruckus in there, shuffling around. It easily masked the noise of the vent cover clattering on the plain white bathroom tiles. Harry crawled inside the hole which resembled a round shining silver tunnel of fabric. Carefully, he put the vent cover back over the wall once having crawled inside and his magic pulled the screws back in place, twisting the vent cover shut. Harry was about to crawl further inside the narrow passageway when Vernon gripped the handle of the door. The fat man attempted to twist the knob. it was locked. "I know you're in there BOY! Open up or I will bust this door down!" Harry backed further into the air vent. It was surprisingly spacious, but maybe that was just because of how tiny he was. Dust rattled off the hinges of the bathroom door, as Vernon slammed his shoulder into it. Then again, and again. The door eventually caved inward, crashing loudly on the ground. Harry covered his mouth so the man wouldn't hear his strained breathing.

 

The man looked every bit like the Vernon in the movie, which was strikingly similar to pork scratchings on a towel. His face a brighter tint than a red coca cola can towards the center, and down his neck, up his ears. The mustache was god awful, and Harry was reminded of Mr walrus from Alice and wonderland for some aberrant reason. Vernon's fair complexion reddened further, letting out a frustrated snarl when Harry was nowhere to be found, flailing his arms. It was oddly comical. "You will come out this instant, you little miscreant! and you will fix this door you broke!" Harry wanted to snort but refrained. He wasn't about to give away his position for anything, not yet at least. Some time to himself first, and then he would focus on revenge. Maybe he'd shit under the stairs, and super glue the door shut. _Yeah.. that thought has some merit, and these people had to have some of that glue in the shed. No normal person doesn't have a glue of such sticking caliber in their sheds!_ _Did they even have a shed?_ hell if he knew, _the movie never really gave a grand tour of the house._ He'd figure it out. _right now, I just need time to himself. Maybe sit here until everyone's asleep. I hope to high heaven there is at least more than one bathroom in this plain plain PLAAAAAIIIIN house should I be stuck in here all night. I don't feel like watching anyone take a shit, I don't_ _want to smell it_ either. A brief pause.  _I doubt they would, mostly because the door is missing from its hinges. The Dursleys are probably too normal to do something like poop without a door attached to the bathroom,_ _right?_ He turned a bit green the more he thought about it. _Then again, they did beat and practically starve a child behind closed doors._ He gave up with a sigh, and if arms weren't so sore and if he wasn't so weak he'd throw them up out of frustration. Instead, he resigned to slumping back against the silvery fabric he couldn't quite put a name to but was oddly comforting. _Today is just not my day..._


	3. Savagery at it's finest.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get downright violent, but first, cake!

Harry sat with his knees pulled close to his chest, his arms wrapped around his skinny shins with the side of his face resting on them. he couldn't believe how bony this body was. one of Dudley's extra large, hand me down t-shirts hung loosely around an almost skeletal shoulder, as he sat within a spacious air vent reminding him far too much of the ones in the video game, Batman Arkham City. He was seated right in front of the cover he sealed with accidental magic just thirty minutes ago, for he had been eavesdropping on the conversation in the next room. The Dursley's assumed he had opened the bathroom door, and locked it before shutting it from the outside to make it look like he was in there while he escaped through the back door. It was a good guess, and something Mandy would probably be doing in the future because it was a clever idea. Petunia claimed he must have run away, and Vernon hushed and assured her gingerly that Harry would be back because he had nowhere else to go. the man must have been a damn schizophrenic because he changed his tone almost immediately, claiming, sinisterly that when Harry did return he would be cleaning the house with a pair of broken legs. Harry didn't want to come out and test the sincerity of such a bold statement, not in his current physical condition. 

 

No.. right now, he was going to wait until they left so he could come out and make a layout of this place, maybe gather some supplies whilst he started to plot the Dursley's future demise. He'd bottle these feelings on his new reality for now, and meditate on it later. 

 

Harry heard another slosh from upstairs and grimaced at the thought of what were happening up there. their voices were barely audible and started to become as such after a series of shuffling, Petunia whimpering and Vernon telling her in a soothing voice that he'd clean her up in the tub, wrap her up in her favorite robe, and tell their son to stay over at his friend's house tonight before they go to the hospital. sickeningly sweet gestures towards a lover made by an evil bastard. but then again, monsters could love their own. The sound of water rushing through the pipes ceased, followed by the sounds of what Harry guessed were wet sloshes within the rim of the tub. Harry thought back on his Van Halen mixtape to drown out the image of Petunia's naked Arse sliding around in the tub upstairs with Vernon's hand all over that questionable merchandise like a black Friday sale. he was very happy that there were two bathrooms in this house, that he knows of at least. he would much rather see Minerva walking around Hogwarts in fuzzy nipple tassels than see the exploded can of biscuits, that is Petunia's figure or what he could imagine being the unlit fuse of black body hair trailing down her stomach to the untamed mossy grotto between her thighs. Harry Gagged. 'STAHP BRAIN! STAHP!' 

 

Fifteen minutes later, heavy footsteps brought him out of his musings, one loud slam in particular. "OW, MY HEAD!" Shouted Petunia. "Sorry sorry, my pet, I'll try to be more careful." Vernon cooed, the sound of wet kisses reaching his ears. Harry grimaced, letting out a sigh of relief once the sound of the front door shut. The garage door opened, followed by the sound of the ignition belonging to a car and they were out of there after five minutes. Harry tried to focus his magic on the vent screws just like before, panic flaring in his chest mixed with want. it was genuine, so his magic was working thus confirming a few theory's he had about, accidental, magic that he'd ponder over later. the lid fell with a clatter, and Harry stepped out of the vent to stretch. his bones popping loudly enough to make him cringe, these were no sounds such a tiny body should be making, and wouldn't ever again if he had anything to say about it. Harry didn't know how long he'd have before Vernon came home. there was no way Petunia would, not tonight anyway. he smirked, unable to imagine what their excuse would be as to why she couldn't move her limbs. he went into the kitchen, and couldn't help but groan. it was so plain looking, just like it had been in the movie. seriously, this whole place was just too ordinary.

 

Opening the fridge, he scanned the shelves for something to eat. the big clear bowl of triple berry trifle cake making his mouth salivate as he pulled it out and set it on the kitchen table along with a large pitcher of pink lemonade. he spots one out of many mugs hanging off a series of miniature hooks over the stove and scoots a chair towards it to give himself a boost. with the mug in his hand, did he smile under the light of the full moon shining into the kitchen window. it must have been daylight savings time, because it really got dark outside, and fast. or maybe time really did pass normally, it always seemed to fly whenever he was lost in his head.. and what a dangerous thing that was. shaking his head, he glanced out of the window and noticed a path leading to the backyard where a red shed sat. his smile turned downright mischevious, as a plan started to come to life behind forest green eyes. he purposely tilted his head to the side so a shine of white slid over his glass lenses as if he were in a damn anime. 

 

He woofed down half the cake in the bowl with a wooden spoon meant for tossing salads and washed it down with sweet lemonade, whilst sitting on the kitchen table. 'so damn good!' It was little wonder that Dudley was so fucking fat. Petunia really could cook, in fact, she could cook so well, that if he hadn't been starving, he might have felt a little guilty when digging into the Pinterest perfect image of the fruit layered trifle cake with such reckless abandon, and without asking! Harry wouldn't anyway because Petunia is an asshole. Setting what was left of the bowl of cake back on the table, had he uncrossed his legs and jumped off after having one last sip of lemonade. It was time to fuck everyone's shit up. 

 

With a sated appetite, Harry ran up the stairs to look around for the master bedroom, upon finding it had he ushered inside the bathroom connected to it and stood in front of the sink. toothbrushes sat in a tall glass, and Harry nabbed them. he went ham on the inside of each toilet in the house before putting them back, it was such a childish thing to do but Harry couldn't hear his internal scolding over the sounds of his snickering. he nabbed a bobby pin off the counter and ran out to the back yard where a red shed stood not too far away. as expected, a lock was keeping him from whatever goodies lay beyond that door. it only took Harry five minutes to pick the lock with Petunia's hairpin and pushed open the door. feeling around the side of the smooth wall, had he found a switch and flicked it upward. with the lights on, he could now see inside the room. a few saws lined up against the wall on hooks caught his eye first, then the tool boxes, long planks of wood, some gardening tools, a lawn mower and finally the chainsaw next to a woodshop table. 'Oh goodie!' 

 

He felt like a child in a candy store and didn't know where he should start first. he remembered thinking about the super glue idea he had and decided to start there. rummaging around in the tool boxes he found a power drill and of course a hammer, bolts, other miscellaneous objects one might find at the bottom of a tool chest, but no glue.. where was the glue? eh, he'd figure it out at some point. putting the hammer through his front belt loop, he made sure to snag the electrical tape too, shoving it in an oversized back pocket. he had risen up to take a good look at the chainsaw. it wasn't exactly lacking any fuel, and Harry decided to take it. walking across the grass to the sliding glass door he noticed it wasn't as heavy as he thought it would have been. he stepped inside the kitchen and walked further down the hall mindful of the walls with such a bulky item in his hand to set the chainsaw on the living room floor. He searched the living room with a twinkle in his eyes and found the radio. he unplugged it from the wall and rushed up into Dudley's room with it to turn it on after setting it up on the bed. some pop was playing on the radio and Harry's nose wrinkled out of distaste. He fiddled around with the dial for a station more suited towards his taste in music. He tapped his foot and nodded when David Bowie's space oddity began playing at a reasonable volume, it wasn't the rock n roll he favored or the soundtracks from anime's he treasured which brought with it, nostalgia, but it would do. He ran back downstairs and found a hat rack sitting by the door. He picked it up, and whilst humming along to the song coming from upstairs he had snatched a pillow from the couch too. 

 

Rushing back upstairs, he knelt on the ground to tape the pillow to the rack. he pushed it upright and eyed it like an uncultured tourist unsure as to how exactly he should feel when standing in front of a painting in a museum. he went to the closet and pulled out a large, long sleeve shirt and fit it over the makeshift dummy before placing it in front of the window. if he turned the light on, the shadow it would cast over the curtain in front of the window could create an illusion, that someone was up here to those outside. all he needed now was something to wrap around the top of the coat rack to make it look like his bird's nest of a haircut. He ran into the master bedroom and found a feathered scarf, snatching it off of Petunia's vanity mirror. he made a mad dash back to Dudley's room to wrap the scarf around the top and took a minute to readjust the pillow with the tape so it wouldn't look like the dummy had a long alien neck. Satisfied with his creation, had he positioned it at a specific angle in the center of the room so it wouldn't appear as if it were taller than him. he flipped on another light and left the room, leaving the door open slightly ajar. Running down the stairs, he fetched the chainsaw, grunting every so often as he lugged it up the stairs. He set it in the closet. 'Soon.' He grinned evilly. 

 

Harry waited at the top of the stairs with a hammer in his hand for thirty minutes, hidden behind an obnoxiously large potted plant. every light aside from the one in Dudley's room was off. the sound of several old classics filled his ears from the radio laying on the bed, his grip on the hammer tightening every so often out of nervousness. soon enough the garage door started to open, followed by the muffled sound of Vernon's shouting. The door slammed open, as Vernon stomped up the stairs. "WHEN I GET UP THERE, I WILL BREAK YOUR LEGS!" The moment Vernon reached the top of the steps, Harry swung the hammer down hard against the portly man's knee. Vernon howled in pain, and fell back, rolling down the stairs. it was oddly Comical, or it would have been if not for the bone in the tubby man's leg shifting outward through the broken skin above the knee cap Harry just struck. Vernon was bleeding pretty bad, holding his leg, trying very hard to hold in cries of agony. 

 

Vernon couldn't believe it, Harry has never done anything like this before, no matter how much they beat him. he had a hard time spinning a lie as to why his wife couldn't move a single limb but was assured she would be fine under the care of the hospital staff and that his wife could go home in just a few days. on his way home, he pondered just what to do with the boy.. no, the demon..how would he be able to leave Harry alone with his family in the house anymore? He couldn't, not after this. the sound of a small motor filled his ears, it was a familiar one he couldn't place.. that is until Harry appeared at the top of the steps with a chainsaw in his hands, and his shoulders hunched. the light from the moon shining through the glass door obscuring the boy's eyes, making his lenses shine an unsettling white in the darkness."I Ought to cut off your legs, Uncle Vermin. for all the years of pain, you put me through. Instead, I will haunt the house like the Demon you turned me into as if a poltergeist." Harry's anger rattled the furnishings in the house with accidental magic, and Vernon's blood ran cold when books had fallen from their shelves, his great grandmother's clock bursting into flames. "You will treat me with respect," Harry spoke in Parseltongue, imagining a snake in Vernon's place. It startled Harry because he didn't think, that speaking the language would work like that.. he was glad Vernon couldn't see his face clearly, or his own surprise could ruin the effect of scare tactics he's trying to enforce on the portly man. That seemed to be the final blow for Vernon, as the bright red that usually tints Vernon's cheeks had turned into something much paler.. his face completely drained of color. a wet spot growing around the crotch of his trousers. He wanted to scream but could not find his voice. "You will treat me with respect, and meet all my demands or I will send you to hell!" Harry screamed in English, adding scornful hisses here and there. the roar of the saw was menacing, and Vernon nodded so hard that he might have given himself whiplash. "Good.." And just like that, Harry turned around and head towards the master bedroom. "I'm taking the master bedroom!" Harry was snickering internally because there was no way he could send anyone to hell, not really, but the fat lard didn't know that. no one in this family did, in fact, if they knew it was just accidental magic fueled by emotion they would treat him just as the same as they always did. if not worse for this little stunt. 

 

Harry didn't exactly know how to turn off the chainsaw, none of the scary video games he played or horror movies he watched explained how to do it, so he dropped it out the window into the backyard. the loud crash causing an uproar of barking from the neighbor's dogs. 'I feel like taking a nice hot bath in my new tub.' And so he did, washing what he could only imagine being several months of grime off his body, but not without filling the tub with bubbles. Harry laid there for several minutes, or was it an hour? he didn't really care, not with how relaxed he felt. The roaring of the chainsaw's engine had ceased by now, and the sound of Vernon shouting for the paramedics to be careful with his hurt knee could be heard from in front of the house. music to his ears. 'It would be romantic in a sense if that monster couple ends up sharing a room at the hospital.' Or so he thought, picking up a purple bottle of shampoo. he popped the cap on the top and sat up to give its contents a good sniff. "Oooh, coconut." 


	4. Building up one life from another.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Dursley's are forced to adjust to the new changes under Harry's rule.

The sound of a woodpecker drumming against bark with its beak woke Harry from his slumber, but it wasn't at all an unpleasant way to stir. the black, eighteen hundred thread count sheets and warm fuzzy zebra print blankets wrapping his body outweighed any slight annoyance with a comforting softness he could get lost in, and the brand spanking new Tempurpedic mattress under him only strengthened his tolerance. Reluctantly he reached for the new pair of prescription glasses on the bedside table and put them on so he could get a better look at the alarm clock. It was six AM on a Sunday, such an ungodly hour to stir from, but required if he was to tend to the growing garden in the back yard. he never had a Garden before, well, Mandy didn't but Harry did and seeing as how Petunia had no idea how to care for it properly told Harry that it was his responsibility. something he wouldn't mind in the slightest, it would be good to learn due to the herbology classes in Hogwarts that he would undoubtedly take in the future out of his own volition. 

 

The Sims three supernatural fairies had given him ideas as to how to fiddle around with his Accidental magic in the garden. he would focus on each plant, cradle buds and attempt to will them into blooming for him, for leaves to mend back together after being nibbled on by caterpillars, weeds to pull themselves out. it was tedious, and difficult for the first few weeks, willing every little thing just right, but it worked. the large wooden fence he commanded Vernon to build around the house kept away prying eyes. The Dursley's gave him a wide berth after the scare he put them through and didn't dare lay a finger on him out of fear as to what he would do to them, Petunia especially. they believed he was possessed by a demon of some kind and gave him whatever he asked for, which wasn't much in Harry's opinion. Harry had a new pair of prescription sunglasses, contact lenses, skin products, hair products, toiletries, vitamins. his new wardrobe resembling something out of an apocalyptic men's fashion catalog. they were really cool garments in Mandy's opinion, remembering as a woman, how she admired the look on men. so when becoming one herself, she just couldn't resist buying what she could. it was still startling sometimes, being a guy.. waking up without boobs to be more specific, after having had them for years. 'at least Harry wouldn't grow up looking ugly as sin.' Were her final thoughts on that. 

 

It's been at least three months since he's used scare tactics on both Petunia and Vernon, and Harry thought it was one of the best decisions he's ever made. 'I have no idea why the original Harry never tried this shit.' Or he sometimes thought, cupping roses in his hands. the Bush supporting each rose having grown up the side of the fence. in fact, each rose bush had grown wildly, it looked very beautiful. it was like living in the tropics in the back yard, and he liked that. he had asked for both white and red roses to grow and groomed them enough to where they wouldn't pose a problem. Petunia always had a vase of them sitting on the table. what bothered him was that he was only eight years old, or so he found out after questioning his so called family thoroughly after his first week as Harry Potter, claiming that he wasn't Harry but a demon who doesn't know much about any of them. it only scared them further, and Petunia fainted when he started talking in Parseltongue again. 'Good times.' 

 

Learning wandless magic was becoming a dreadfully slow process when it came to using spells without speaking them aloud, in some of the oddest ways too. for instance, it was extremely hard to use Lumos on the tip of his finger, but he could use Crucio or other spells like Wingardium Leviosa on Vernon like it was nothing. but maybe that was just because of his strong feelings of hatred towards the Dursleys. whatever the case, with how malnourished his body was, using more than fifteen spells a day wore him out. He needed to continue building up his strength, and of course, keep practicing spells on Vernon. the fat lard made a great test subject. 

 

The sound of the alarm blared when the clock struck six thirty AM. He sighed, turning it off and walked butt naked into the master bathroom. 'Time to get moving.' From downstairs, Petunia was standing in front of the stove wearing a pink bathrobe. dark circles were under her eye's, and the front of her hairline was noticeably thinning if not just a little. she was under immense stress, feeling as if she were a prisoner in her own home. Vernon even threatened to leave her five times last week, shouting about how he couldn't live like this. She remembered crying on the bathroom floor, and the demon... the Demon did something evil to her dear husband, making him spasm on the ground, telling Vernon that he would be staying right where he was for the rest of his life. it was a frightening thing, living with that freak..

 

Vernon's knee was never going to heal properly if the Demon kept hurting him throughout random parts of the day, not even with today's modern medicine. it would never be the same. It broke her heart in two when she had to tell Dudley they needed one of his rooms for themselves, how he cried. she held him close, kissing his head and rocked him in an attempt to sooth her precious son. She hated telling him no, hated yelling at him or being unable to give him what he wanted. times were just changing it seemed, her only peace at mind being Dudley leaving the demon well enough alone. the boy was scared to death, after seeing the pain that Demon put his daddy through. Dudley never stayed inside the house for too long, always running around the neighborhood with his friends to escape the horror.. he's lost so much weight... she didn't know how much more her poor heart could take. 

 

Flipping the egg with a spatula, had she whimpered. her marriage was in ruin, her son was too scared to stay in the house and she was all alone. all thanks to that, that demon! Vernon limped inside the kitchen, taking a seat at the table. he didn't say one word to her, as he unfolded the newspaper. he didn't even give her a morning kiss. a tear slid down her cheek.


	5. Practice makes perfect.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just as the title reads, and I would prepare thy anus for the next chapter. there will be lots of gore, and of course, dumbledore!

Harry laid on his side in the garden, facing a rose bush covered in red blooms. his arms stretched out, gently cupping a blossom in his hands, willing the vines to grow out, and weave around the bloom in the shape of a simple crown. a bead of sweat dripped down his left temple, his focus unwavering. he had been at it for at least thirty minutes now, having made five flower crowns like this with his magic. it became a daily afternoon ritual that aided both his wandless and accidental magic. the more complex the design when molding the vines to shape a crown the more he could feel his stamina getting stronger if not only by a centimeter each day. attempting to shape various elven crowns he's seen on Pinterest as Mandy, drastically improved his ability to perform spells without saying them aloud to make them work. A cherry red cd player was lying by his side, as a pair of headsets held snug over his black hood slash cowl, the music playing in his ears long forgotten, what with having increased his concentration after the first two months of this personal training. the volume was high enough to hear from a few feet away. the song 'bad medicine' blaring from his headsets.

 

'Your love is like bad medicine  
Bad medicine is what I need  
Shake it up, just like bad medicine  
There ain't no doctor that can cure my disease'

 

Three sets of thirty-five vines bunched together as if three sections of hair, growing towards his palm, the rose acting as a beacon, bringing the right strand over the middle and then the left strand over the middle.

(Bad medicine)

'I ain't got a fever got a permanent disease  
It'll take more than a doctor to prescribe a remedy  
I got lots of money but it isn't what I need  
Gonna take more than a shot to get this poison out of me  
And I got all the symptoms count 'em 1, 2, 3'

 

 

Sweat dripped down his face, as all three strands willed to the side as if held with an invisible hand, each kept separate, moving like a school of fish. slowly he gathers a small even section from the right side, adding it to the right strand.

'First you need  
That's what you get for falling in love  
Then you bleed  
You get a little but it's never enough  
And then you're on your knees  
That's what you get for falling in love  
Now this boy's addicted 'cause your kiss is the drug'

  
'Your love is like bad medicine  
Bad medicine is what I need  
Shake it up, just like bad medicine  
There ain't no doctor that can cure my disease'

 

 

His fingers twitched, winding the same strand to the right, only to change all of the strands over to the right while mindful not to mix them or unravel the slow forming twist.

 

 

  
'Bad, bad medicine

I don't need no needle to be giving me a thrill  
And I don't need no anesthesia or a nurse to bring a pill  
I got a dirty down addiction that doesn't leave a track  
I got a jones for your affection like a monkey on my back  
There ain't no paramedic gonna save this heart attack'

 

 

When you need  
That's what you get for falling in love  
Then you bleed  
You get a little but it's never enough  
And then you're on your knees  
That's what you get for falling in love  
Now this boy's addicted 'cause your kiss is the drug

Your love is like bad medicine  
Bad medicine is what I need  
Shake it up, just like bad medicine  
So let's play doctor, baby, cure my disease

Bad, bad medicine  
Is what I want  
Bad, bad medicine  
Is what I need

 

  
_[Solo]_

 

 

his magic pulled, gathering another section from the left side, adding it to the left strand. willing the strand to the right, he brought the wound right strand over to the left, the right twist left somewhat loose. with the left twist positioned in the middle and the other strand on the right, a sigh left his lips, he could now add more vines. he grinned triumphantly.

  
'I need a respirator 'cause I'm running out of breath  
For you're an all night generator wrapped in stockings and a dress  
When you find your medicine you take what you can get  
'Cause if there's something better baby well they haven't found it yet

Your love is like bad medicine  
Bad medicine is what I need  
Shake it up, just like bad medicine  
There ain't no doctor that can cure my disease

Your love—bad medicine  
Bad medicine is what I need  
Shake it up, just like bad medicine  
Your love's the potion that can cure my disease.'

 

 

Harry repeated the first two steps through the fourth until all of the vines he willed to sprout and extend from their Bush were caught in the braid.

'Bad, bad medicine  
Is what I want  
Bad, bad medicine  
Who's bad, who's bad

I gotta do, I gotta  
(Bad, bad medicine)  
I gotta do, I gotta  
I gotta, I gotta  
I gotta do it again'

 

 

Bringing each end around, had they intertwined, holding tight. he pulled a pair of gardening sheers out of his pocket with his free hand, vertically snipping the excess vines away. dropping the shears, he held the crown carefully as to not prick himself with the thorns. each visible thorn he willed to the ground, another mental push bringing buds worming their way out of the woven grooves. 

'Wait a minute  
Wait a minute  
Hold on  
I'm not done  
One more time with feel  
Come on  
One for that  
Help me up now

Your love is like bad medicine  
Bad medicine is what I need  
Shake it up, just like bad medicine  
You got the potion that can cure my disease

Your love—bad medicine  
Your kiss is what I need  
Your love—bad medicine'

Each bud began to blossom, the aroma reaching his nose. it smelt heavenly. with the task done, he allowed himself to rest his eye's. little known to him, Minerva was watching from her hidden position behind the dark wood fence facing his back. her nose slightly peeking over the edge, as her crows feet bunched near the corners of her eyes gesturing a smile when spotting the several woven crowns hanging off the bushes in the garden. after a few minutes, Harry's soft snores mixed with loud music blaring from his headphones at a volume that could very well damage his hearing reached the old witch's ears. Minerva willed the volume down with her own magic, unfortunately, she had no idea how muggle items worked, resulting in the volume skyrocketing instead. Harry sat up startled, trembling, throwing his headphones off his ears with a pained expression on his face. "FUCK!" came his shout, his eyes squeezing shut. Minerva blushed, guilt filling her chest as she apparated away. 

 

 


	6. Just how many people are in on Harry hunting?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit goes down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got home late from work today, so I wasn't able to fit Dumbledore's half into this chapter because I am too tired. I will, however, be adding it tomorrow. oh, and corrections n re-wording will be made too. might have made some errors in this chapter.

The back of a high-collared, detailed cotton long sleeve top brushed against the bark of an old dead tree, followed by the back of equally as detailed baggy trousers, against one of the many zipped pockets of Harry's pants. hands raised mid level with his chest, gesturing mock surrender, Harry's eye's twinkled mischievously, as he tilted his head to the side so a lock of his hair slid over his peripheral vision. it always wanted to drape over an eye..'I should have never gone with the dated haircut of Leon S Kennedy, it's driving me nuts! how do you do it, man!?' or so Harry thought, ignoring three seventeen-year-olds, who dressed as if they raided an old navy. they had cornered him from all sides, each wearing a striped shirt that's color differed from the other.and the Cargo shorts... Harry so desperately wanted to set them on fire when he first laid eye's on them. one boy even wore socks with sandals. 'The humanity!'

 

"Oi! I'm talking to you freak!" The blonde boy with a chipped tooth in the center barked, his fists tightening at his sides. "Hmm?" Harry's head perked up, genuinely looking surprised when he was anything but and trying to find a way out of this sticky situation that first started out as an evening stroll through the park. the boy's face reddened out of anger. "I said, why haven't you been in school? we miss having our favorite punching bag so close to our high school." He sneered, as another with freckles and a darker shade of sandy blonde hair smirked, unnecessarily adding his own two cents. "I bet he's afraid to come back because we'll kick his arse again." The two at his side laughed, and Harry narrowed his eyes. 'What grown adults beat up an elementary student?' If anything, Harry didn't go to school because he already went through it all once as Mandy Mathews. he didn't need a repeat, and Petunia was happy enough (forced) to take him out during the first week of becoming Harry, claiming to all who are curious about it, that she's homeschooling him. they even had the right paperwork to prove it. the reality? Petunia wasn't teaching him a thing and leaving him be. to Harry, he needed to spend as much time as possible focusing on personal training. Hogwarts wasn't as far away as one might think. 

 

"He's probably homeless, and can't afford an education! just look how he's dressed, looking like a railroad-riding hobo!" Harry had to bite his bottom lip to stop himself from exploding with anger because this entire situation was fucked up. he covered his mouth, beginning to tremble with fury at the thought of other children these goons picked on. the teens who were practically grown men mistook his body language for fear. "Aww, what's the matter, Harry? Afraid?" One taunted. Harry regained his composure, having bottled his emotions tightly. brushing his hand up over his face, and through his magically straightened out hair. he was thankful he hadn't been wearing glasses.. if those men got ahold of them, he would have been royally fucked. he noticed the spiked, bare branches from overhead swaying in the calm breeze. Harry smirked. 'If I could only will those down..' he looked back at the teens and said. "It's called apocalyptic fashion, you needle dick bug fuckers!" Harry spoke menacingly, but with the tone of his tiny voice, it hardly had an effect on them. "What did you call us!?" One invaded Harry's space, grabbing the front of his shirt. 'Big mistake.' Harry dug his fingers into the man's forearm, watching it hang loosely at his side, then the other. "What did you do to me?!" Harry raised his hands, spreading his fingers and wiggling them as if he were going to tickle them. "I just went Haku on you." Harry loved doing this to people as Mandy Mathews, it never got old, in this life included. "What-" "Kneel!" Harry interrupted, quickly bringing his fingers down again, jabbing at the bloke's leg, said bloke's face shifting into sheer panic when forcibly brought to his knees.

 

Harry dealt the final blow, and the man collapsed, blue eye's rolling towards the back of the blonde's skull, a small bruise on his forehead. the other boys froze, stunned at what they just witnessed. Harry shifted one foot ridiculously forward, another scraping rearward as he wiggled his fingers, grinning like a madman, his gaze now on the other two. "W-what did you do to Ken?" Harry only tossed his head back, disguising it as a laugh when checking his progress in willing the branches off of the tree. it wasn't with enough force, so he focused on pulling at them harder. 'Almost there..' He thought, starting to sweat from the magical strain. He looked back at them, saying in his best(Which was a horrible nasally, and very annoying Severus Snape/Pixelcatgamer impression) "His name is Ken? what a faaahggot!" One of them closed in on Harry, anger fueling the flare to his nostrils. 

 

A hard fist clocked Harry across the mouth, busting his lip and sending his back slamming against the tree. Harry kept his grin despite the visible wince he released, spitting blood at the man's face. "Is that all you got, you fat choad?" Harry continued to taunt. the two teens started wailing on him with their fists, bringing him down. Harry just clenched his teeth, releasing "Ch's!" with each blow, which lessened the impact of each hit drastically. the branches broke, and came down hard, as if magic, their spiked ends impaling warm bodies, which brought a stop to the merciless beating being inflicted on poor frail eight-year-old Harry. One branch went straight through the sandy blonde's shoulder, exiting out the other side, another lodged deep in the back of his leg. blood gushed from his shoulder onto Harry's face, as the man screamed. The other man was in even worse condition, having his left arm and hip pinned to the ground. Harry thought it made the guy look like a frog on a dissecting tray. Harry didn't think screams could get this loud, either. the boy on top of Harry got off when Harry smirked, taking hold of the branch sticking out of his shoulder, twisting it harshly. blood leaked from it, staining Harry's contact lenses. the teen fell to his side, his cries an even higher pitch than before. 

 

Harry got off the ground and approached the boy pinned to the grass, getting in his face. they were both eye to eye. Obliviate. Harry cooed, wiping the minds of his ex- attacker's of everything that happened in the past thirty minutes, leaving them both in a silent, yet very temporary daze. he did the same for the unconscious man and left the crime scene. with all the screaming that went on, there were sure to be adults coming to investigate soon. 'I think I willed the branches down too hard... whoops.' He cast one last glance back at the damage. 'Eh, they will live.' Harry bolted home with the hood etched onto his shirt over his face, feeling very relieved he wore black today.


	7. Update

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why me...

So, I bet you guys are wondering why I have no chapter up. this is because I found out that I will be working late AGAIN tonight to fill in for someone who got hurt at my workplace. the good news is it won't be for too long and I will be able to upload regularly again starting Thursday. I covered for them yesterday which is why I uploaded chapter six later than usual on said day, and when I got home and wrote the chapter up I made too many errors that I don't want to make again tonight in sleepy slurs. Msd was wonderful enough to point it out so I could go back and fix it. Great dood. SO until Thursday, this lovely fic will be put on hold. I really wanted to upload today but I'm wiped out.

hope to be uploading really soon. 

\- BrightestOfCrayons.


	8. A whole different kind of horcrux

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the title reads, because in a world of witches and wizardry, why shouldn't it be possible? it will be for our little alternate reality, at least. more about it will make itself known in time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The part I wanted to add in the last chapter is here, as I slowly get the ball rolling back into daily updates. ***This chapter has been updated.** please comment below if it makes any sense, I need to know if I explained it better!

Dumbledore sits alone in his beautiful circular office, with little noises echoing off the stone walls and nooks of high ceilings. a number of curious silver instruments standing on spindle-legged tables, whirring and emitting little puffs of smoke that Dumbledore found oddly soothing considering the situation he found himself in whereas it normally would have driven up the wall and annoyed him like every other little thing when he was in a mood. perhaps it gave him something to focus on in place of his latest giant failure. it didn't work for long. The loss of half Harry Potter's soul was too great a loss...Minerva, she had warned him not to leave Harry with the Dursleys, but he didn't listen despite how right he now knew she was. his stubborn nature and damn emotions clouded his judgment, making him truly believe that just maybe those muggles would grow to love him, his guilt of not having looked after his own sister when she was alive had fueled his patience with the muggle family. He never thought Harry would starve to death under the stairs, he never thought the Reality- soul splitting Horcrux he made for the boy would destroy itself so soon. The Horcrux was supposed to be a precaution in case Voldemort killed the boy during the future war. it was complex, the craftsmanship and overall a draining process to have split the boy's soul like he had the night before handing him off to the muggle family. The special Horcrux kept one half of the soul anchored to the body, while the other safely drifts through dimensions where time passes much faster than where the first half is, latching onto a living being almost as if a parasite and replacing the host's subconscious with its own, only to make the unconscious decision to body jump when nearing the end of the body's lifespan. it was meant as a way to gain as much knowledge as it could until the first piece of the soul dies. It was to ensure readiness and make training Harry much easier the second time. The Horcrux itself was a solid object, much like regular Horcrux's were. the object allowed him to monitor the part of Harry who is at the Dursleys, and when Harry starved to death under the stairs it turned pitch black. this could only mean the anchored half of the soul had been destroyed, whereas the second half had been pulled back to its original body for good. Memories included from each life it robbed. but just how many lives had the second half lived? the boy was certainly smart, convincing the Dursleys he was a Demon to cease further abuse, but how in Merlin does he know spells from the wizarding world when he doesn't have a way of knowing? Minerva's reports claim he's put Vernon under several Crucios, does this mean the second half of the soul had been a dark wizard from a parallel dimension at some point? the boy's control on accidental magic was amazing, the child was even getting to the point where he could cast spells without speaking them, and without the use of a wand! this told Dumbledore that the boy was going to grow up strong, and ready for the dark lord. but would he willingly fight for the light? there was always hope, his compassion for the boy would easily make him give the child the benefit of the doubt. 'I'm so sorry Harry.. please, please bare with me, for, in the end, you will get to choose how you want to live your life or rest peacefully....' Or so he thought, unable to speak those words without a crack in his voice. tears gathered in his eye's, threatening to fall down his cheeks but he willed them away. He failed Harry twice now, or so it seemed... he couldn't protect his parents, and he couldn't protect him from his remaining family members who made his blood boil. all he could really do was grieve right now, reflect, plan and move on. the walls covered with portraits of old headmasters and headmistresses were snoozing gently in their frames, and Dumbledore was relieved none of them were awake to see the circles under his eyes he has yet to hide under glamor charms, that have been growing worse these past three months.

Large stacks of papers held together by giant cow clips sat in organized piles atop the enormous, claw-footed desk which Dumbledore currently sat behind, and, sitting on a shelf behind the desk, were the shabby old sorting hat between a wide spacing of books. the old hat staring rather curiously at the headmaster who was holding a pitch black candy dish lazily on his lap. "If I do recall, the dish was originally a clear glass." Said the hat, his weak attempt at asking an a-round-about question regarding the dish had not gone unnoticed by the headmaster. "It was, yes." Came Dumbledore's weak reply, as he brought his hand up to gather the strands of his beard and smooth them down in one stroke. at that answer, the hat knew the headmaster was preparing himself, albeit reluctantly for an answer full of half truths in his ever so cryptic explanations. 

The headmaster began to tilt the dish with the slow rise and fall of his knee, watching several lemon drops roll to one side of the dish and to the other. "The dish was meant to stay clear when created, monitoring the condition of half a soul that was sent to a safe place while the remaining half, latches onto another life in a much safer place no wizard can ever reach. a place where time could either be much faster, where that half would live without realizing who they really are, and gain knowledge like any other, however, if the first half withered would the dish turn black, and a magic pull from the first soul would use any means to gain back the other half, merging them in an attempt to re-strengthen the first. the only problem is that since the first Soul's in near death state, would the second half overpower it, becoming the more dominant half. the one in control. it would be a body with only half a soul." The sorting hat could only stare at Dumbledore, hanging on every word. it was so rare that the headmaster shared this much with him, unless.."This soul wouldn't happen to be someone coming to Hogwarts in near the future, would it? I will be placed on their head, and sorting them into a house, won't I?" Dumbledore's eyes twinkled, as he shifted in his seat, turning around to look up at the sorting hat with a mischevious smile. "Perhaps." the hat only smiled back at having had his answer confirmed, but the tears that have gathered, and yet to fall from those auburn eyes made the hat debate whether or not to press on, it didn't, not like it would get anything else out of the man anyway. It's leathery lips slowly began to thin, Dumbledore could see that the hat could see his distress and refrained from asking any further questions, which the headmaster was grateful for. Dumbledore turned back around in his seat, and placed the bowl of candies back on the table, picking up a tissue to dab away the moisture in his eyes. the headmaster had no idea what Harry would be like once he got to Hogwarts, how many lives he lived, or just who the boy lived as, but with what little information Minerva had been giving him over the past three months in short detailed bursts was a little unnerving if not humorous. 

 

he couldn't tell her about the Reality port key Horcrux he made for Harry because they were highly illegal and he couldn't make another or he'd risk damaging the soul. all he could do now was wait and see just who Harry has become before continuing on or making adjustments to his plan as a whole to keep it aligned the best he could with the prophecy. he's lived long enough on this earth to realize just how deadly life's surprises are, and how much he can confide in the many predictions of fortune tellers. with a prophecy predicting the end of the dark lord he couldn't destroy, paving way for a brighter future's foundation, he will ensure it's set in stone no matter how many sacrifices he must to make.. even if it kills him. it was for the greater good. a familiar magical signature brought him from his musings, forcing his wand up to glamor away the large bags under his eye's with practiced precision. just in time for Minerva to step into view. she appeared distressed, and with his kind grandfatherly demeanor firmly in place across his light features had he started with. "Ah, Minerva, do have a seat. would you like a lemon drop?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The moment when you realize the Oc isn't an Oc.


	9. Inner debates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry thinks about what to do next.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy this calm little chapter, it's going to get bat shit crazy in the next.

Harry clutched the side of his gut where it had been bruised by fists, as he ran home, obliviating memories of the very few people he passed on the way. he was lucky enough that bruises were all he received, but his face and clothes were covered in blood belonging to those who ganged up on him, and luckily they had targeted his body more so than his face. he sported a busted lip and was pretty sure he had a small bruise under his eye hidden by blood, he would have to hide it from the Dursley's or else he'd prove to them that he was much more subset able to beatings then he let on, that he lied to them. he couldn't let that happen and would hide away in his room until the bruises fade. maybe use some of that concealer Petunia left in the bathroom drawer for his face, what with her being too afraid to fetch it or even go in the master bedroom anymore. the apocalyptic wardrobe he owned covered the entirety of his body, so he didn't need to worry about them seeing the bruises littering his limbs. so the clothes and makeup would have to do until he could get his hands on a book about beauty charms. he'd be able to do all sorts of things with those and hoped there was something about coating a layer of vaseline lotion on his body without having to apply it by hand because that would be very helpful if he only had time for a shower before future classes started. 

 

He might just ask Petunia if she's kept anything of Lily's, like journals or school books. he knew for a fact that Charms had been Lily's best subject in school, and could have all sorts of notes written down that he could study, and if they were protected he would just get Petunia to open them all first so whatever unpleasant protection spells lashed out at the intruder it would hurt old horse-faced Petunia instead of him. it was the perfect plan, but it would only work if there were even any books and journals at all. The moment Harry stood in front of the door, he schooled his features and slammed open the door.Petunia was sitting on the couch, her eyes widening in horror at the sight of his bloodied face, it was not at all his own. he licked his lips. "Ah, didn't see you there, Human." Dudley, who was sitting beside his mother, screamed and ran to the kitchen. the sound of the back door slamming told Harry that he fled outside. Petunia didn't move a muscle, and Harry stepped inside the house, shutting the door abaft him. "I'll be in my Den, you best not disturb me." 

He raised his hands, jumping out at her. she flinched, screamed and fell off the couch. "Too easy." He spoke in parseltongue, laughing maniacally as he moved slowly up the stairs, disguising his limp as a predatory stalk. Petunia fainted the moment Harry reached the top of the stairs. from inside the master bedroom, Harry limped inside the bathroom and turned on the water. he peeled off his clothes and chucked them in the hamper, his body was covered in bruises that would take weeks to heal with how malnourished his body was. it wasn't as bad as before, but it was still recovering slowly with the daily vitamins he took with every meal. three months ago, and he could see his ribs. now? he wasn't too skinny, and he wasn't too muscular either. he was in-between and felt good in his own skin. He stepped in the tub and dropped one of the many bath bombs he had purchased into the water, watching the sparkles stretch. steam, as well as the sweet smell of roses, filled the air. 'I'll need to get some Epson salts..' or so he thought, wincing while his body adjusts to the hot temperature of the water with every inch he lowers himself. he laid back and sighed, debating wether or not he should work on obliviating the memories of each person in this neighborhood so he could start over with them, and perhaps develop a healthier relationship with each on a friendly acquaintance level. 

The Dursley's would be too scared to say anything bad about him now that they thought Harry was a Demon. yeah, that sounded like a good future project. it would serve as good practice too.


	10. Seriously, Obliviate is the most useful spell ever.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time skip - two months.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's this? Sixty-four kudos? You guys...-Sniffle.- you are all amazing, and clearly have good taste in mediocre stories like mine! Thank you all! oh, and we are getting close to the start of Hogwarts, yall! Lemmie know in the comments what you would like to see happen at the school and it might just end up in the story.

A tiny figure clad in black had crouched behind a bush, holding a simple sheet of paper. the light of the moon revealing this youth's detailed, jersey long sleeve top made with finger sleeves. the hem of this shirt stretched a few inches over his crotch, and beneath the shirt had he been sporting smooth elastic neoprene, minimalist super baggy trousers with zipped pockets holding at least one bag of skittles. Harry reached into the side of his left techno neoprene dotted high top boot, pulling out a fuzzy pink feather pen, his action rattling the tiny silver handle of the boot's zipper.

 

Smirking under a pair of night vision goggles, which's strap had been prevented from digging into his skull by a soft black beanie beneath it, had he brought his hand up to tap the on switch with the back of his knuckle. his vision went green, his surroundings becoming much more clear. glancing down at the sheet of paper in his hand, did he look over the map he drew of the entire neighborhood. tonight was the night that he stealthily Obliviated all of his neighbors in small groups at a time, preferably in their sleep, ridding them of their memories of him so he may(Not get his ass beat every time he tries to go on a walk by some shit kids!) start anew, and if the doggies wanted to bite or give chase, he'd stupify them.

 

Using the tip of his ballpoint pen, he crossed an ex over the first house before putting the pen under his beanie and behind an ear afore casting Silencio on his person and sneaking up to the side of a fence. he pockets the paper, and climbs, forcing the plant life below to bloom and give his foot a boost. he dropped soundlessly onto the backyard and was immediately met with what looked like a very large pit bull. "Oh... shit.," he whispered, forgetting for a moment that he had cast a silencing charm on himself. that dog was ginormous and seemed to shoot up and growl. Harry quickly cast Silencio on the dog and watched it's mouth open and close silently in a series of barks. it dashed for him, and Harry fell on his bum, casting the non-verbal spell, Stupify. the dog fell to its side, and Harry stood up, quickly making his way towards the back door, casting Alohomora whilst focusing on the keyhole. it clicked open and casting yet another Silencio on the door had he pushed it open.

 

Harry snuck around the house, and after a few minutes did he feel something soft brush up against his leg. it was a pretty white cat, that made him blush. "kAWAII!" He shouted, kneeling to pet the kitty behind the ears despite how it couldn't hear him. The cat purred and rolled over on the ground, making Harry squeal and give the pretty kitty all of his attention. he had a weakness for cute little animals and had at least seven cats at home. nobody really needed to know about the sixth or seventh cat, and the law which states you can only have five back in the states can kiss his ass. rules were for chumps, and he'd have had nineteen little cats if he knew he could get away with it.' I will have nineteen cats no. twenty. no.. all of them.' or so he thought, as his nostrils flared at the seriousness of it all, afore the bushy cat tail brushed under his nose. his attention had been brought back to the present, smiling down at the cat to pet it again. 'I need to get some cats..' He rose from the ground, and cast a Silencio on the steps, climbing them shortly after. he didn't need any unnecessary creaking.

 

the inside of this house was a carbon copy of his own, and Harry had a feeling it would be like that for each of the houses in this neighborhood. 'How predictably boring.' he mused, reaching the top of the steps to stand in front of the master bedroom. he cast another Silencio on the door, and pushed it open, finding a slumbering couple asleep in their beds. wordlessly, had he Obliviated both of them, focusing on ridding the memories of him from their minds. he'd already practiced it nearly a hundred times on Dudley, which made it all the more hilarious when he scared the shit out of the boy. he had no idea who Harry was, or what he did to the boy in the past, but he knew that Harry was dangerous, leaving him well enough alone as per requested by Petunia towards her son.

 

Harry had no desire to hurt children, especially eight-year-olds. it felt wrong, so he wouldn't do it. this didn't mean he wouldn't duct tape the little shit to a wall for whatever reason, that would be hilarious. as soon as he finished casting his spell, he sought out the bedrooms to see if there were any children who're memories he needed to wipe. Casting Silencio on the first door, he pushed it open. it was a nursery. in the corner a crib. he immediately shut the door and explored the rest of the house. there was no one else, and so he left the home through the garden and hopped over another fence to explore the next house. it was going to be a long night.

 

It had been three hours, and Harry managed to cover thirty houses around his block, and there were at least seventy-five more houses to go. it was going to be a long and tedious project, that would probably take a few weeks to complete if he went out like this every night. the bright side was that he'd no longer have to worry about Harry hunting, and he'd get some practice in on using wandless magic. he was already proficient at it, but there was always room for improvement. he also proved one of many theories revolving around the ministry of magic, which was in order to get in trouble by the ministry, you needed to cast a spell from a registered wand. he had cast a spell using wandless magic all night, and nobody has been getting on his case.

 

he felt suave as he walked into the thirty-first home that night, but paled real quick when he noticed four giant Doberman dogs on the couch in what looked to be the living room. quickly, he cast a Silencio on them, the moment their heads shot up so their barking wouldn't alert those occupying the house, but at the cost of getting a sharp set of teeth sunk into the flesh of his arm. He let out a silent scream, and then again as the second bit his calf, yanking harshly. the dogs pulling from opposing ends made him fall face first onto the ground. the third bit his thigh. the fourth circled the scene, snarling. there was no doubt it wanted to get in on this. The dogs tugged hard, showing Harry no Mercy. Harry's blood gushed from his body. his heart beat was skyrocketing. fear rushing through the entirety of his being mixed with adrenaline, but the will to live outweighed his fears at the moment.

he cast Stupify with reckless abandon, his eye's clenched tightly. he only stopped when he wasn't being bitten anymore. opening his eyes, he noticed each dog on the ground. Harry panted, curling into a ball on his side and cradled his arm. he was sure those teeth struck deep enough to pierce bone. pushing back his sleeve, he winced. the fabric sticking to the messy wound. it was already getting infected. blood ran down his arm in a small stream onto the hardwood floor. 'Vulnera Sanentur' or so he chanted in his mind, whilst the adrenaline was still flowing through his body. at least fifteen times, focusing as hard as he could.

 

The spell was taking effect after the fourth attempt. his blood slowly but surely coming off each dog's maul, the floor, and his clothes, seeping back into his wounds. the wounds themselves closed after at least seven long minutes, leaving the place where sharp canines ripped into his flesh with only a few pink marks in the shape of teeth holes. it was still sore in a series of phantom pains he was sure would increase in the morning. "Fuck dogs.." He muttered silently, unable to be heard from being under the spell, Silencio. he was absolutely drained, and nearing magic exhaustion. he stood up with a limp and wiped the mind of the single occupant living in the house before he went home, calling it a night.

 

He didn't even bathe or get out of his clothes. he fell on the bed at a sideways angle, turned off his night vision goggles and fell asleep.


	11. Dusting off old memories.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry finds the Diary of one Lily Evans Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two more chapters, after this chapter until Hogwarts. I start adding the year and date too. Oh, and I must warn you. there is Death in the next chapter.

October, 1st, 1988.

 

Harry stepped out of the large jacuzzi sized bathtub after pulling the drain and fetched a towel from the rack, watching glitter from a bath bomb flow down the drain for a moment afore plopping the fluffy light pink towel atop his head. He noticed at least seven, white short, haired, three-month-old kittens were huddled together in the sink, sleeping where his shirt was. he smiled at them, whilst bringing his hands up to begin drying off his now shoulder length hair. He wrapped the towel around his head, stepping towards the sink to brush his hand across the fogged mirror. vibrant, almost glowing jade green eye's stared back at him.

 

he sighed, reaching for the vaseline lotion's dispenser sitting by his kittens. pumping a fair amount in his hands, he brought them together to begin moisturizing his smooth, bare skin. to Harry, a lot had happened after he successfully wiped the memories of his neighbors back in June, having finished such a tedious task around the middle of July. he felt so accomplished, and in need of compensation all at the same time after what the Dursley's put him through, that he forced Vernon to buy a luxurious jacuzzi bathtub, even going as far as to hire someone to install it in the very spacious master bathroom tied to the bedroom he himself occupied. it was lovely, and Harry had been kind enough to count it as an early birthday gift for Harry's upcoming birthday on July thirty-first. well part of it, anyway. he would also be buying plenty of bath bombs because those were amazing, and this family had the money to spend on a plethora of frivolous things every other day. Including laser eye surgery that fixed his sight.

 

Other than the large tub, Harry bought a cat at the beginning of august, a beautiful, short-haired white ball of fluff with a black heart marking on her nose that he named kitty. not long after adopting kitty she gave birth to at least seven, white short haired kittens covered in black spots. it was a dream come true, and Harry decided to rip the door off the cupboard leading under the stairs, where he had Vernon hire someone to redecorate it, turning it into Kitty's room. it was spacious enough for the cat and her kittens and remodeled into one of those ridiculously luxurious animal bedrooms, with the walls painted up a lovely cream with clouds on the ceiling and little realistic cats positioned as if little human cherubs with wings flying around. little white sheets painted as if they were swaying over each cat's genitalia. it even had a lamp in that small enclosure that turned on with a clap. above the door in sparkling pink paint did it read 'Kitty's room', the fabric on Kitty's simple, yet oversized pet bed holding more thread count than the Queen sized bed in Petunia, and Vernon's room, which irritated them to no end. Harry threatened that if they bought anything that felt different from hospital sheet sand paper, he'd cover their bodies in boils with his freaky demon powers. he did it to Petunia once already, and she has to this day, been too terrified to try buying proper sheets again.

 

The kittens were treated like royalty and fed tuna packages for every meal, often running around the house and wreaking havoc on Petunia's drapes. the litter box was in the bathroom downstairs, where Petunia kept it clean. Harry could feel his magic reserves have grown tremendously, having practiced every spell he remembered from the Harry Potter series religiously, as well as accidental magic. He's not forgotten one, keeping the list of them in a journal in the drawer of his bedroom. each holding a name, as well as an explanation for what they do. it has taken him several months leading up until today to write them all down, but it was done. All he could do now was keep practicing. there were at least two walking, talking and breathing practice dummies in this house he could use a good number of them on, after all.

 

Every morning, he'd go on a jog, bathe, eat, garden with magic, play with the cats, practice magic, bathe again, read a little manga, eat, sleep, repeat. to his neighbors, he was a shy, polite, if not abhorrently dressed, intelligent little boy who so happened to be Petunia's nephew. The Dursley's had nothing but nice things to say about him as well, too afraid of what the demon living in their house would do to them if they were to cross 'It' in any way. not that Harry cared about their feelings, for they had put him through too much to have the right to complain. Petunia was practically bald and overweight from stress and overeating that also gave her dangerously high blood pressure. Harry openly joked with the woman about how Tuney over ate from having a husband who hardly touched her. Dudley was a fit young boy who was involved in as many sports as he could be in to distract himself from the madness at home, but aside from all the chaos, he was relatively happy and healthy, physically. Dudley escaped the churning of internal damage by hardly staying in his home unless it was time for dinner or to sleep. Vernon was about as model thin as Harry chose to be. but Vernon hardly ate because of all the strain he was under from being hexed, his knee that was never allowed to heal properly and the added stress that comes from having to put up with a havoc-wreaking Demon in their house. The man turned into a workaholic to keep whatever sanity he had left intact, that and silently casting the blame on Petunia for ruining his life while glued to his study. The family overall was difunctional, but it worked.

 

Harry walked out of the bathroom after applying rose scented deodorant, and brushing his teeth, releasing the steam trapped from inside the bathroom. he opened a nearby window, then the closet. he pulled a white, fit minimalistic top with a high collar and long finger sleeves. Mindful of the towel around his head, he pulled it on and fetched a pair of pink silk boxers from the dresser drawer, slipping them on. He knew it would be a little chilly in the gardens, so he pulled a soft, heavy knitted, asymmetric ribbed shawl with high collar from the closet. after slipping that on over his shirt, he knelt to dig a pair of white socks from the bottom drawer. sitting on the soft zebra print bedspread, had he slid on his socks, he noticed several of the kittens that were laying in the sink were running out of the bathroom now. the warm steam which brought the kittens as much comfort as a warm incubator to a bundle of tiny chicks, long since cleared.

 

Harry blushed at the adorableness of their raised tails and playful roughhousing with one another, afore he stood up and reached for a pair of smooth neoprene minimalistic two faced baggy trousers off a hanger in his closet. After putting them on, he slipped into his techno neoprene dotted high top boots, zipping up the sides. he stood up and pulled his favorite, smooth neoprene visor hat from atop the dresser and stepped over a few rambunctious kittens to get back into his bathroom. he put the hat on the counter, pulled the towel from his damp raven locks and tosses it in the hamper. He picked up the pink brush on the counter and untangled his hair. willing it straight with accidental magic, with each stroke to his silky raven locks. Setting the brush down with a clank, he smoothed his hair up into a high ponytail, willing it dry at the same time afore tying it with a hair tie. Putting on his cap, he pushed the tail out the back of the cap and looked into the mirror. half of his face was obscured by the white knit he pulled over his shirt, but that was all apart of the style. 

 

 

One of the kittens jumped on his shoulder, as he exited the bathroom, purring loudly the moment Harry began scratching behind its ears. with the blush hidden by the knit obscuring half his face, he walked downstairs to fetch his gardening tools from under the kitchen sink. Petunia stood in front of the stove frying an egg, wearing an ugly purple Walmart bathrobe. A lone hair curler in her super thin, trump comb over, for what's left of it, anyway. 'At least she's trying.' or so he thought, unable to hold back his laughter. he noticed her grip on the handle of the spatula tighten, and could see her scowl in the reflection of the glass window in front of her which made him laugh even harder. Vernon was snickering a little too, and Harry walked out the back door. the moment the door clicked shut, he could hear the sound of a frying pan slamming against the floor, and a shrill scream, followed by Vernon's cursing to 'Shut the hell up.'

 

The weather in this country was so much different than in the Americas, chillier, even in the summers according to the locals. it wasn't unpleasant, however, and it allowed him to wear as much layered apocalyptic outfits he wanted without having to worry about it being too warm to wear out and about. the moment he knelt in front of one of his rose bushes, the cat on his shoulder leaped off, sprinting back into the house through the flap that had been installed on the door for such a purpose. Harry snickered again, reaching for a few leaves that had been nibbled on by pests, mending them back together with accidental magic. the Garden of roses looked Pinterest picture perfect, his magic healing and keeping each rose bush in bloom despite how much the plant life around the neighborhood wilted or wanted to hibernate. the grass remained a healthy green. it was his pride and joy, next to each of his kittens. he wondered for a moment, which cat he'd be taking with him to Hogwarts in place of Hedwig, as he pulled a cd player from the basket, along with a pair of headsets. he turned it on, and pressed play, reminiscing to the original soundtrack of Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt as it's lovely melodies caressed his ears. it was so strange, how the cartoon existed right now when it had been created in the two thousands. in fact, a lot of stuff from the future existed right now. like laptops, and windows ten, high-speed internet. not to mention youtube, ill will press.com and dozens of manga series that came out in two thousand sixteen and seventeen.. the times where Mandy had originally come from. but they did miss a few things in this world, like the iPhones and iPods. maybe that was all just because he's in a different universe? maybe a parallel earth? it was too hard to wrap his brain around, so he decided to drown himself in the music.

 

After a few hours outside, he puts away the tools and heads back into the house with the basket over his arm. the moment the door closes behind him from inside the house does he will away the dirt and grass stains on his trousers. he knelt by the sink, and after putting away the basket of gardening tools does he pull down the knit collar past his chin. nabbing a box of strawberry pocky from the pantry, as well a juicer. he heads upstairs, nibbling on a stick. he pauses, looking at five kittens that gathered in the hallway, each staring at a string hanging from the ceiling that their mother 'Kitty' had managed to leap up and bap. The string interested Harry as well, but for an entirely different reason. there was a door that the string pulled open, an attic door.

 

Putting the pocky down on a nearby end table, he pulled the knit back up to cover half his face and gently shooed the kittens a safe distance away afore pulling on the string and willing the steps to fold down. he climbed the steps, peeking his head up into the dark room to get a good look inside. his eye's watered from all the dust, and cast a wordless 'Scourgify'. the dust cleared almost immediately, and Harry climbed up, casting 'Lumose', focusing the light to the tip of his index finger as he began to explore the spacious attic. the wooden floorboards creaked under his designer boots, the light shining over several clear plastic boxes holding several uninteresting miscellaneous objects. 'Nothing of interest.' He noted until the light shined over a cardboard box in the far end corner. the cover marked with a sharpie, reading. 'Lily Evans' Harry stared at the box for several moments, before kneeling in front of it. he pushed the lid open, and his eyes widened at what was inside.

 

There were several school journals, Quills, and books kept together with a belt. one even reading 'Herbology.' Harry felt like he hit the jackpot, placed the lid back over it and cast 'Reducio' Shrinking the box down to the size of a pill bottle, followed by wordless feather charm. he pocketed it, and rose to his feet, casting another 'Lumose' to search for more boxes. He found at least fifteen total, casting the same spells as before so he could easily pocket them. it took him at least seventeen minutes to find each box. once each sat in in his many pockets, he climbed back down the steps. Willing the attic steps back up, and shutting the door with Accidental magic, he turned on his heel and fast walked to the bedroom with pent up excitement. Four of kitty's kittens following after him.

 

As soon as the kittens were safely inside, he shut the door. but three more kittens jumped in through the flap, as he sat on his knees. He placed each box he found on the floor, before casting 'Engorgio' on each, bringing them back to their original size. the kittens tilted their heads, and Harry couldn't help but squeal at their adorable puzzled expressions. He put one kitten on his lap, and carefully removed the lid from the closest box. he rummaged around in it, finding school journal after school journal. even school books. Feeling as if a kid at a candy store, he didn't know where to start first. so he decided to organize everything in piles based on what interested him the most. School books would go in one pile, journals would go in the next and random objects would stay in the boxes just in case a kitten got a little too curious and ended up hurting themselves with them.

 

When sorting out the last box, he found something that made his heart nearly stop. a light lavender Diary, that predictably read 'Diary'. he reached for it and prayed to whatever god was out there it wasn't warded before he opened it. it wasn't. the kittens gathered around Harry, laying in a pile on his lap as he sat crisscrossed on the floor. the book was full of everyday tidbits of her life and charmed to extend in length apparently. there were more pages than appeared from the outside of the thin journal that he lazily skimmed through. he had to stop when spotting a photograph. in the moving photo, a very young, and cheerful Lily Evans sat with her arms wrapped around a young and very much blushing Severus Snape in their school uniforms. 'That bitch, with her arms around my man...' Harry thought, as jealousy flared in his chest. his face blank in expression, but his eyes were giving an icy glare that eventually froze the photo in his hand, stopping all movement in the photograph. it startled him. "Oh shit!" he dropped the photo out of surprise. the picture fell onto the wood floor, shattering into a million pieces. the noise spooked the cats off his lap, each bolting up and around the room with their fur ruffled. Harry could only laugh at how cute it looked. he fell back on the floor, swinging his elbow over his eyes, a soft sad smile on his face, obscured by the high knit collar over his lips. 'Poor sempai...' or so he thought, his mind wandering towards Severus. Harry wondered what he was doing right now. 'Perhaps he's behind a large cauldron, brewing a potion of some kind. I wonder what expression he makes when he brews...' A blush threatened to turn the tips of his ears a bright pink. "EEEEEE!" He squealed, turning to lay on his side and pull the closest kitten into his arms. it mewed, and Harry giggled.


	12. Unfair..Death..Despair..

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just as the title reads, let's get into this.

October 19, 1988.

 

Petunia stood in the living room, wearing a simple, long, soft bathrobe. her feet bare, as her toes were slightly unkempt. She stared off into the distance, running her finger along the baroque, freshwater pearl necklace around her neck. it had been Vernon's grandmother's, the priceless heirloom gifted to Petunia for her twenty-third birthday. Petunia could remember that day very clearly, held in Vernon's warm embrace under a beautiful weeping willow in the park of this very neighborhood. It had been a time in their young adult lives of soft, warm promises of how he'd buy her a house here like she always wanted. he had kissed a light trail up her arm that day, the words 'My pet' caressing her ears after his lips kissed the back of her neck. she had blushed, shivered pleasantly so and giggled, returning the kiss tenfold with her arms finding their way around his neck. he truly cherished her more than anyone else in the world. never in her life, had she felt more loved, desired, wanted, and beautiful than when she was held in Vernon's arms. if only she had the power turn back time..

 

She had hoped that this Demon living with them would have brought her and Vernon closer, but all it did was drive him further away. she cursed Lily, cursed her each night. she used to harbor such Jealousy for her sister, hoarding the school journals from Hogwarts after she died, wanted nothing more than to read them. to attempt the magical feats Lily performed, but the magic lacing each book kept them clamped shut. she could never read any of them, not even Lily's Diary. so she tried to burn them all out of rage and frustration. the knowledge that she'd never ever get to be a witch resurfacing from the far depths in her mind. then, out of a fit of despair, she cried, pulling the journals out of the fireplace into her arms, hugging them close, mourning the loss of Lily, feeling horrible for having tried such a thing. Lily was HER sister, she wanted nothing more than to be just like her, to have attended Hogwarts with her.. but she couldn't, and wound up portraying just how she felt about it in all the wrong ways. boxing away the books, and stuffing them into the attic. she truly loved her sister, but she hated Lily all the same. she hated Lily even more than she loved her, for she had abandoned little ol Petunia for Severus Snape as children, for living in the wizarding world with her wizard husband James Potter..and for dying. for leaving her with another painful reminder of the power she wasn't born with, in the form of an infant, that stared her in the face, unknowingly, silently and constantly conveying to her that she'd never be a witch or live in a magical world of fairytales she's only dreamt of and read about by existing.

 

She developed a way of coping, by forcing her ire out on the child she wanted nothing more than to smother in its sleep. it had become a way to vent pent up frustration in daily life, the boy became a lightning rod for everyone in the house to strike out at. Petunia didn't feel an ounce of sympathy either, blinded by jealousy and anger. but now... now all she felt were regret, regret for having pushed the boy too hard, to the point a demon possessed his frail body. after that, she lived in a constant state of fear, having her husband struck throughout random parts of the day with a Demon's Ire. oh, how she tried to comfort Vernon, hold him, even. but he snarled at her, pushed her way. the pet name he had given her went from 'My pet' to 'Woman' which upset her more than the fact he wouldn't touch her anymore... sex was sex, she could get it anywhere but love was love..something she treasured and wanted more than physical affection. the pearls around her neck were worn out of the remembrance of the love they used to share for one another, it was all she had left of him.

 

Bringing her hands up to squeeze her shoulders, had her fingers gripped at the Orange- neon fabric of her simple, long bathroom, loosening it at the seams. it had become a nervous tic she had developed over these past few months, not that it even mattered. they were all cheap robes, robes she chose to wear because she could no longer fit into the many beautiful outfits that made up her wardrobe. she decided to head into the kitchen, and grab a slice of cake. she wasn't hungry, but she needed something sweet. something to make her feel better, fill the void. her waistline be damned. she was losing her hair, had developed dark circles under her eyes, she never left her house, fearing what people would think or say to her about her looks.. she deserved the sweets!

 

Her pulse skyrocketed when she spotted the Demon in the kitchen, sitting at the table and eating HER food, out of HER kitchen, wearing nothing but a pair of pink silk boxers none the less!

 

 

it's lack of propriety angered her, as did it's very existence! she daresn't say a thing unless she wanted to end up like Vernon. one of those damn cats were sitting on the table too, biting at one of the white roses sitting in a simple vase on the table. Petunia didn't understand why the cats weren't afraid of the Demon, perhaps because they had been possessed animals. she wasn't sure, and too afraid to find out. reading about illnesses always made things worse on the reader, after all, and the subject of the paranormal triggered her to the point of no return. Petunia was going to turn around, and leave, but the book in the Demon's hands made her stiffen. It was a book from Hogwarts! suddenly, years of suppressed sadness, angst, jealousy, and hatred filled every fiber of her being. "YOU DARE?!" Petunia snarled, choking on her own spit, stomping around angrily as her blood pressure began to rise. a splitting pain filled her chest only moments after. she couldn't breathe, and her eyes widened out of fear as she clutched her breast. Fear, pain. she slid down the wall, having a convulsing fit in the door frame in between the kitchen and the corridor leading to it. she slumped against the door frame after a few seconds, her body unmoving. Harry could only watch in horror as the woman had a stroke, and died on the floor.

 

When Petunia was no longer moving, Harry sat there for several seconds, unable to believe what had just happened. fresh tears welled in his eye's, as he pressed his palms against them, leaning back on the chair. 'Poor Petunia!' Harry screamed internally, unable to speak. his lips were trembling. "I'm gonna be sick!" He croaked. Harry knew Petunia was a horrible person, but she didn't need to die. he was actually starting to warm up to the woman, despite how much she hated him. she always cooked the food and cleaned the house. something he had truly started to appreciate. the little grudge in his heart against her nearly half way gone. 'this wasn't supposed to happen!' Harry thought. 'Petunia was supposed to stay alive in the series!' he stood abruptly, unintentionally painting the floor in rough harsh brown streaks with the bottom of the chair's legs, followed by a squeak. he bolted out the back door, bent over and vomit on one if his beautiful rose bushes, watching his regurgitation sink between the cracks of the somewhat dry patch of earth under his feet. it took him several minutes before he regained his composure and went back inside to dial the police. it was the least he could do, and wouldn't just pin the job on Vernon. he didn't want Dudley to come in here and find his mother dead on the floor either. 'No little boy should see that.' or so he thought, sniffling whilst stepping over Petunia's dead body to get into the hall and towards the phone in the living room. he cringed at the expression on her face, the terrified look in those glazed over eyes and sped off down the hall without looking back.


	13. The days that follow.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry reflects on Petunia's death, and Halloween just isn't Halloween without homemade pumpkin bread.. or without Vernon duct taped to the ceiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my gosh you guys! I'm so excited, you wanna know why? because I'll tell you. Not only will there be a time skip, but we finally get to Hogwarts in the next chapter! woohoo! 
> 
> P.s.
> 
> I'm not apologizing for a day late update, for I was nose deep in a fanfiction called 'Law and Love' by 'Robin_Mask' The writer really got Snape's character down to a T, I think.

Harry spent the next few days laying in bed, with eight white, black spotted cat's coming together to lay in a pile on his upper back. the side of his face smooshed against the pillow, as his arm hung off the side of the king sized bed, his index finger lazily tracing the flock of turtle doves carved into the rich dark wood finish of the bed frame. the cats haven't got up much, aside from using their litter box, only to come trotting back to plop atop their master's back. it was as if his kittens could feel his anxiety, and were attempting to soothe his worries, their noses lightly brushing up against his very ticklish neck once in a while to make him laugh when his mood got worse. Petunia was gone and had come back to the house just yesterday in the form of a small Urn that sat in Vernon's study, which surprisingly, Vernon paid no mind. it was as if he didn't care at all, and probably didn't, what with how he grumbled on about how Petunia got what she deserved for bringing him into all of this. every time Harry heard those grumbles, he bristled. Petunia was in no way a nice woman, but Petunia's death was still fresh on everyone's mind. it was inappropriate, too soon and uncalled for. to Harry Petunia was the only one who would love Vernon knowing he was a child abuser, and that was saying something. granted, she was a child abuser as well, but the twisted, yet heartfelt sentiment remained in mess somewhere. Vernon shouldn't be acting this way, but then again it's always easier to pin the blame on something or someone else than it is to accept the situation Vernon found himself in. blaming Petunia for everything was probably the only thing keeping Vernon going these days. 

 

Dudley refused to come back into the house, locking himself in the shed to cry and scream himself hoarse. he hardly ate or bathed out of his own volition, and missed school. it wasn't a healthy way to grieve, but Harry wasn't about to comfort the child. the best Harry could do was cast a Silencio on the shed, and leave baskets of food by the door. Maybe he'd steer the boy back into sports by forcing Vernon to put the kid on a softball team or something. the boy was still scared stiff of Harry, and for good reason. it wouldn't be crazy for the boy to assume Harry killed his mother and he wasn't entirely wrong. Harry didn't outright kill her, but he helped, just as Petunia herself had. Petunia was a ticking time bomb of high blood pressure, and cholesterol, choosing to work herself into a lather, which brought her own ruin. she could have chosen to react differently towards the situation, but she didn't. the fact he, metaphorically speaking, had been the one jabbing her with a stick in all the right places hadn't helped either. from the jokes cracked about her ruined sex life to the constant hexing of her beloved husband. he had a hand in her demise, realizing only a day later that the Diary of her dead sister had been the final blow. It made Harry feel like a horrible protagonist, that belonged to some sort of wild Harry Potter fanfiction. but that was just it.. this wasn't a fanfiction, it was very real, and Petunia's death showed him that. he had to start taking things more seriously, not that he hasn't been doing that already. he just needed to try and be more subtle with his actions from here on out, or else he might start leaving behind trails of dead bodies in the far future and it would be partially his fault much like it had been when Petunia died. 

 

Harry glanced up at Lily's journal on the bedside table, reaching up to pull out a picture he stuck between one of its pages to serve as a bookmark. it was the only moving photograph he's come across so far with just Severus in it. Severus was blushing, looking at Lily who stood behind the Camera, her hand moving into view from behind it every now and then, trying to get his attention. Severus looked thirteen in that photograph, trying to fight a smile as he occasionally looked out at the lake. It made Harry's heart melt, and burn pleasantly so with a fierce intensity that forced an uneven blush to surface across the bridge of his nose. Harry wanted nothing more than to save him from Nagini's bite and whatever else that might try to act as a substitute for the Potion Master's death if those fangs never met such a delicious neck. he wouldn't allow it and refused to give the image of snape's future death scene more thought than necessary because it wouldn't be happening. he wouldn't just prevent Severus's death, though. he'd try to stop Sirius, Lupin, and Dobby from biting the dust too. he'd find a way to do it one way or another, even if that meant going to the ridiculous extreme of reading sappy ass romance novels to the phoenix in Dumbledore's office to harvest enough tears to fill an oversized pickle jar.but in all seriousness, the school journals, and books that Lily left behind would be a good place to start if he was going to be saving anybody. Harry pressed a chaste kiss against the photograph and giggled when wet kitten noses brushed against the nape of his neck. "Stahp!" he squealed. 

 

*************

 

October thirty-first, 1988.

 

Harry had spent a considerable amount of time coaxing himself out of what would become brief fits melancholy if he were left alone with his thoughts for too long, by distracting himself with the old school books, as well as preparing the house for Halloween. the entire property was decorated with spooky crafts Dudley was forced to make, knowing it would count as something slightly soothing and remedial to ease the prat. the boy was too scared to refuse, but it wasn't like Harry was mean enough to pin all the tedious craft making on the boy. Harry himself had cast several charms inside the house, ones he found in Lily's journals, that strewn paper bat's up on the walls in rows. the paper bat wings were charmed to flutter, the mouths charmed to part and squeak when someone motioned passed them. the way Vernon flinched each time made Harry laugh. other than craft making, Harry worked on cooking a batch of Petunia's homemade Pumpkin bread from a recipe the old crone had written out in a handmade cookbook sitting in the cabinet.

The book sat open on the counter, and Harry was leaning over to look over its contents. he was humming melodies from Castlevania's symphony of night soundtrack softly to himself while standing with his hands intertwined abaft his back, atop a stepping stool. his accidental magic spiking around, as if it were second nature, greasing and flowering three baking pan's in mid-air that he had pulled from the kitchen cupboards. 

 

A large bowl floated out of another cupboard, a spoon from a drawer shortly after, followed by pumpkin puree, and eggs from the fridge, oil, and sugar out of the pantry, water from the tap. with a twirl of Harry's finger had the items come together, being mixed well. another bowl had been brought out, hovering by his side, a whisk laying gently along the side. the flour, baking soda, salt, cinnamon, nutmeg, cloves, and ginger made its way into the bowl from tinier bowls laying out on the counter, the whisk beginning to move. Harry yawned, gesturing the second bowl to hover over towards the first. it tilted slightly, the whisk stirring the dry ingredients into sticky pumpkin mixture, blending it nicely together. 

 

He reached for a glass baking dish, and held it in his hands, watching the mix pour itself inside of it without leaving a messy drop of batter from the bowl it came from, almost like magic. Harry grinned as the baking dish floated out of his hands, and into the oven to sit on the top rack. Harry raised, and beckoned a finger, causing the oven door shut. Just then, Harry heard Dudley cry out in the other room, along with what sounded a lot like the front door opening. 'Is Vernon hurting that child?!' Or so Harry guessed, his blood running cold as he darted down the corridor leading into the living room. Dudley was tugging Vernon's white shirt dress shirt loose from the haphazardly ironed out work trousers, in an attempt to pull the once fat man back inside with tears and snot streaming down his cheeks."Don't leave me, daddy!" Vernon tried to shove the boy away by the chin, struggling to free himself from his son's strong grip. "Let go! I can't be in this house for Halloween! the demon is sure to try something horrible on Halloween!" Harry scowled at what he was seeing and hearing. he raised his hand, clenching it into a fist, causing a hard pull of his magic that had both Vernon and Dudley on the floor inside the house within seconds with the door slamming shut in front of them. They flinched, and Dudley was a shivering, whimpering mess. 

 

The lights began to flicker, uneven black lines that patterned down Harry's jack skeleton costume wiggling violently. the black paint across his lips branching outward around his face like unkempt rose vines ruining the finish of a house. his high ponytail snapped, his hair flailing around his head wildly. In Parseltongue, does Harry start to chant not once, but twice "Silencio." Dudley screamed silently, and Vernon paled when he heard the click of the lock on the front door. 

 

"So you want to leave the house, scared I might do something horrible...." Well, Vernon wasn't wrong, or at least he would have been wrong just for today if the man hadn't tried to leave his son home alone with what the once fat man assumed were a demon. "Monsters are supposed to love their own!" He hissed in parseltongue, venom lacing his words as he cast a nonverbal feather charm on the man, only to hiss out "win guardian leviosa" It was Vernon's turn to scream a silent scream, unable to understand what was said as Harry brought him up against the ceiling. A drawer slid out of a desk nearby, clattering on the floor. the items inside rattling. a thick roll of glittery pink duct tape started to rise. Harry grinned viciously, as the tape sprung upward, smacking the once fat man across the face before it started fastening Vernon firmly to the ceiling with its long sparkling strips. Harry's raven locks began to calm and rest against his shoulders in healthy waves. "Dudley!" Harry snapped, speaking normally now. the boy's attention had been caught. slowly did Harry say in the lowest tone he could muster "Fetch me..." He paused, an eery smile forming up the left corner of his painted lips. "The litter box." Dudley ran to fetch it immediately, and it hovered out of the boy's hands the moment he got back in the living room, positioning itself directly under Vernon. "Well, Vermin, enjoy the rest of your Halloween." With a crooked smile, Harry turned to face Dudley, who flinched. "You will eat some of the bread I made later, then you will bathe, and go to bed." Dudley nodded quickly. "Good." With a bounce in his step, had Harry made his way back down the corridor, hoping that when Vernon fell, the side of the once fat man's face would land in a pile of cat shit. it was Vernon's fault for not doing his job, and keeping it impossibly clean like Harry demanded.


	14. Letter from Hogwarts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know I said in the last chapter, that this one would have Hogwarts in it and I was totally going to skip Diagon all together for it, but then I got this crazy idea about dragging Vernon along for the ride in place of Hagrid. I'm taking extra time to work on that chapter, So, the chapter after this one will have both a Diagon alley visit and the train ride to Hogwarts. A combo special. 
> 
>  
> 
> P.s. 
> 
> It may or may not be a bad thing that I figured out how to post pictures in my archive stories. so, expect random shitty pictures from Microsoft paint in some of them.

July, 24th, 1991. 

 

A healthy head of ankle length hair had been brought up in a high glittering jade colored ponytail atop Harry's head, the layered, spiked bangs framing his face strikingly similar to Kamui Gakapo's. the length of both locks layered at the far end of his bangs stretching to his mid thighs and fastened a few inches above their ends with small glittering jade colored ribbons. wrapping his petite body, were a momme lapel collar, long silk robe the color of dark jade. it brought out his eye's, and dark raven hair perfectly in Harry's opinion. this robe, along with several others in different colors were what Harry decided to order a year ago after the neighbors started complaining to Vernon about how the boy tended to the garden in both the front and back yard as well as checked the mail in nothing but his breeches. they had threatened to call child services if nothing was done about it, adding that it has gone on long enough and, begrudgingly, Harry caved into the demands of his neighbors. he felt no desire to 'obliviate' the neighborhood again over something stupid, or just so he could continue to walk around half naked. it was too much trouble. 

 

Harry supposed it was high time to buy a set of Pj's anyway, what with Hogwarts right around the corner. he couldn't just walk around the common room in his underpants, the head of his house would have a fit! whoever that might be, though Harry had a feeling he might end up in Ravenclaw with all the heavy reading he's been doing over the years. The image of Filius Flitwick's tiny foots stomping up and down made Harry picture a pair of kawaii cat ears on the tiny man's head during the little guy's tantrum. It made Harry laugh. dark soft locks brushed past his shoulders, as he rolled over on the couch to meet a tiny pair of jade eyes that matched his own. it was Kitty, staring at him from where she sat by the lit fireplace on a plush recliner he charmed pink and fuzzy. ten two-month-old kittens were either wrestling each other or running friskily around the living room with their tails in the air. Harry only smiled, shutting his eyes, allowing himself to drift off to the sound of the cracking fire and rowdy kitten feet padding across the floor. 

 

Kitty's children have been little hoes, multiplying like daisies over the past year. little white daisy's covered in black spots. there were at least thirty cats running around in the house now, five of them had taken a shine to Dudley which Harry allowed the boy to name and keep. the child needed comfort more than ever after his mother died, the cats having helped the once prat tremendously. Dudley was put on a softball team, visited a therapist once every week, and was much kinder to others, happier even, knowing that the Demon wouldn't hurt him so long as he stayed out of 'it's' way. Vernon hired a maid to clean the house three times a week to keep it tidy, and Harry cooked all of their meals in a crock pot to keep them all fed, claiming that cooking interested him and he wanted to do it. the remaining Dursley's were skeptical at first about the food, wondering if it had been poisoned, but they were forced to eat it every day anyway. It was Dudley's responsibility to clean the dishes afterward, often times helping Harry cook. Harry wanted to drill each easy recipe into the little boy's skull so that when the time came for Harry to leave for Hogwarts, the child wouldn't have to eat take out every night. as much as Mandy hated Dudley in the series, Harry wouldn't be so cruel as to leave a child without the means to prepare a decent meal for himself because Vernon certainly wouldn't do it. 

 

The once fat man kept to his study per usual, only coming out to go to work, and tend to his basic necessities, but has been tasked to clean out the giant inflatable pool filled with kitty litter every day. Harry practiced magic and studied Lily's books from the first year leading to the seventh, religiously, when he wasn't gardening with his headphones on. The garden had doubled in size, and Harry allowed the vines to stretch up both inside and outside the walls of the house because it looked eerie, intimidating Vernon. Harry even willed buds on sections near the windows, forcing them to bloom whenever he was in a good mood. It was early morning, and Harry was about to fall asleep on the sofa when a loud clattering of metal startled Kitty, her fur ruffling around her neck as she leaped high into the air with a hiss, the kittens bolted under furniture or down the corridor leading into the kitchen. Harry flinched, his eyes shooting open. propping himself up on an elbow to look around, searching for what his kittens were so up in arms about. a large owl flew by the window, and Harry paled. 'Don't tell me..' Harry sat up, letting his legs down from the couch so he could ease his well-manicured toes into simple, soft dark jade house slippers. his heart hammered in his chest, as he bit his lower lip, tasting the Coca-Cola lipgloss gloss which lingered there and shimmered under the dancing flames in the fireplace nearby. 

 

Harry rushed to the front door, his long, straight ponytail swaying in his wake. he paused in front of the door, eyeing the red stamp on the back of a letter on the floor. he approached it warily, the sound of his footsteps reaching his ears. when kneeling on the ground, he did so in such a way that wouldn't reveal his smooth pale legs. the ribbons hanging from his hair brushing along his knee's, as the back of his long ponytail smoothed out along hardwood floor beneath him. Harry reached for the letter, picking it up with soft, well-kept hands, the glittering jade paint on his short nails glistening under the light of day shining into the room from the glass piece on the door. he turned the letter over to look at the front. 'It's from Hogwarts.' Releasing his bottom lip from under the light press of his front teeth, had he opened the letter, taking the folded piece of parchment out of the envelope, letting the now empty envelope fall on the floor. by then, kittens had scurried out from under the furniture and started to make their way to where Harry was to sit around him or bite the back of his long hair within their reach. Kitty herself moved to sit on his lap, as Harry unfolded the parchment thrice and read aloud. "Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards. Dear Mr. Potter, We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. Term begins on September first. We await your owl by no later than July 31." Harry eyed the list of items he needed, followed by an address on where to go in order to purchase these items. he lowered the letter, ignoring the rambunctious kitten that decided to nibble on the edge of the parchment. "Am I even ready?" he whispered, glancing down at Kitty with worry, to which Kitty responded by pressing her nose to his. 

 

 

Harry chuckled, looking down at his kittens, reaching out with a finger to poke the one who was chewing on the letter against the nose. "Boop." the kitten fell back on its tiny rump, reaching up to pap at Harry's finger curiously with a paw. "Now which one of you should I take with me as my familiar?" He asked them rhetorically, scratching lightly behind Kitty's ears, the sound of her purring filling his ears as she drooled on him. he squealed and scooped Kitty up from under her arms, pressing his nose against hers again. "I guess I already knew the answer to that one, and I'm pretty sure you do too." He brought Kitty into his arms, mindful of the letter. "We're going to Hogwarts, can you believe it, Kitty?" Kitty only drooled more than she had before. Harry knelt again to pick up the envelope the letter arrived in when another fell out of it with a.. a key? "Audible gasp!" Harry might have been overexaggerating at that moment, but he was unnerved for several reasons and needed to treat this situation with the utmost ridiculousness or else he'd start to dwell and worry about why things were so different from the book and movie right now. raising a brow, Harry set Kitty down to pick up the parchment folded once, unfolded it and began to read aloud "Dear Mr. Potter, I send you this key, trusting you are mature enough to manage the money in your Gringotts vault wisely and to spare a few pennies for the school supplies listed on the previous letter. I have personally informed the Goblins that you will be stopping by the bank in Diagon Alley sometime before September. P.s. Don't forget your key." Harry noticed this letter's parchment differed from the fist, as did the handwriting. no name.. nothing that would give a hint as to who might have sent it, but Harry had an idea because there was no one else on this entire planet that could be this vague and iffy or have his Gringotts vault key. 'Stupid, cryptic old fart... " Harry muttered silently to himself, as he walked back into the living room praying to whatever god might be out there that the plot isn't unrecognizable by the time he gets to Hogwarts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you all know, I take some heavy duty painkillers on a daily basis for several herniated discs, so when I write, I often leave out a few sentences, fuck up pronunciation, etc, only to go back and correct them much later under a drug induced hangover. I still miss a lot of mistakes, though. but if you guys see anything out of order in the story, and it grinds your gears.. feel free to let your inner grammar nazi shine, and let me have it, because like you guys, I enjoy a story that makes sense. ^^ I'm not apologizing by the way because a sorry means you won't do it again, and you and I both know it will happen quite often.


	15. Diagon Alley trip part 1 of 2.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry drags Vernon through Diagon Alley for school supplies, gets sidetracked by a certain 'Choice ass' and things just spiral downward from there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter I am breaking down into two parts because it is pretty big, or at least in my opinion it is, and I already have it all typed out but need to spell check everything in the next piece I have before posting it. which i will do later.

July, 28th, 1991.

 

"No, turn around, you just passed the sign!" shouted Harry from the back seat of Vernon's dark red, Ford Thunderbird, the leather squeaking under his tush, as he scoots up to slap the once fat man across the back of the head with a rolled-up newspaper. "W-here?!" Vernon stuttered, slowing the car to a stop during his pause afore adding. "I can't see it." Harry only hissed when Vernon didn't listen to simple instructions, as he proceeded to curse in Parseltongue and climb over the front seat. Harry placed his hands on the passenger seat to better balance himself, as he sent a few hard kicks against Vernon's shoulder with the flat heel of his designer boot. Vernon sputtered when his face hit the window, his cheek smooshing against the glass, fogging it with his breath through grit teeth. "Move. over. Human!" Harry shouted between kicks, frustration rolling under his tone. Vernon managed to unbuckle the seatbelt with shaky fingers after a few seconds, it was a little hard to do when under this much pressure. especially when the Demon hissed like that, it always made him jittery. The metal buckle smacked Vernon across the face the moment it unclicked, causing the once portly man to sputter again. Harry grinned viciously, willing the door Vernon was leaning on open with accidental magic. with one final rough kick, did Vernon fall out of the car with a loud thump. The once fat man groaned from the fair amount of pain he was in, laying on the somewhat deserted street. Bringing his hand up to rub where he had been kicked multiple times, did Vernon open his eyes.

 

Harry shut the door with a slam once seated in front of the steering wheel, rolling down the window to look down at Vernon. "This is no time for a nap, Vermin, get in the car!" Vernon could feel the pain in his shoulder throbbing with his pulse, and took a few shaky breaths, reaching out to hoist himself upward with the support of one of the car's many handles. Once inside the car, he leaned against the back seat with a grunt, his joints aching terribly for several obvious reasons. While Vernon shut the door, Harry adjusted the rearview mirror and cast a few quick silent glamors on his eye's and teeth. when Vernon glanced up at the mirror, glowing jade eye's with black slits met a pair of terrified blue. "when we get into the leaky cauldron, you are not to speak unless spoken to and will stay where I can see you, do I make myself clear?" Vernon nods his head swiftly, and Harry smiled widely, revealing rows of sharp teeth that seemed to stretch past his back molars, which caused Vernon to pale. "Good." Harry looked away from Vernon and willed the weak Glamors away. After adjusting the seat, and putting the car in drive, Harry steered the car into a diner parking lot nearby. "Out." Harry spoke monotonously, heavily emphasizing the letter 't'. Harry patted his pockets to make sure both his Gringotts key, and Hogwarts letter was on his person. they were.

 

Harry walked down the sidewalk, with Vernon trailing not too far behind, as they made their way to the Leaky Cauldron. Harry decided to wear a light beige, detailed asymmetric long sleeve hooded cardigan, the fabric giving a sort of a dirty effect in vibe, which was closed by a zipper. Overall it was a raw, and deconstructive trashy look but it gave sway and could pass as wizarding robes that caressed the back of his calves, so he wore it. Underneath was a fine knitted oversized vest, matching the color of his cardigan. he wore a pair of dusty beige, detailed high-top summer boots, which closed by a side zipper. the bottom of his trousers tucked into them.

 

 

 His scar was covered by his bangs, the long ends of them peeking out from under the hood draped over his head, said ends tied midway by dusty beige colored ribbons. his long high ponytail tucked beneath his vest and cardigan. clear bubblegum lipgloss gave his lips shine.

 

Vernon was turning heads in his fully lined, bright red, polyester suit jacket, that has two button closures on the jacket's front, and false pocket flaps. The man's trousers matched the jacket in color and were neatly pressed, said trousers holding elastic bands at the sides for a more fitted look. Vernon's shoes were a well-polished pair of black Italian loafers. His hair had grown out a bit and so Harry charmed it up into a man bun in such a way that would hide the specks of gray lingering here and there, his walrus mustache now a classic handlebar, befitting of a villain. Overall, it would be easy to spot Vernon in a crowd, and that's the look Harry was aiming for Vernon to have today just in case the Alley was about as crowded as it had been in the movie. Harry had no desire to hunt the man down. too much trouble, as was going to a tailor to get Vernon fitted for another suit that fit his size zero frame. The fifty dollar monstrosity Harry ordered online was worth waiting a few days for before taking their trip into the alley.

 

The two took a sharp turn around the block on Charing Cross Road, where after a few minutes of walking, Harry spot an old rusted cauldron above a worn, almost antique looking pub door. Harry pursed his lips, as he stopped in front of it. "Once we pass these doors, you are to refer to me as, Mandy Mathews. Do I make myself clear?" the boy asked, turning to look up at Vernon. the once fat man nodded. "Good." Harry had no time for all that recognition, not yet anyway, plus he didn't have the ensured safety, that a certain intimidating looking half-giant brought. so after casting a quick Glamor charm on his face had the scar under his bangs vanished.

 

Pushing open the doors, the melody of a Lute and light conversation caressed both Vernon and Harry's ears when stepping inside. it was dimly lit, the walls a dusty stone befitting of a castle with alcoves leading into more shaded area's where stone benches were lined across the walls. one long wooden table sat ten feet away from the door, covered in ale filled tumblers, baskets of bar food and smelted together lit candles. Harry passed it calmly, eying the large arched window above it with a squint, and then the dust particles dancing in the ray of light it cast onto the center of the table. a few feet away from that, was a grand fireplace that's warming heat made the bar feel cozy. The people were lively, and vast the majority wore old robes, some spectacles, others with odd hats, and long graying beards. The woman looked about as ghastly as they had in the movie, if not a little worse, though some cleaned themselves up better than others. A few people stood in front of a stone bar, speaking with a balding old man wearing an outdated bartender's suit. "And how may I help the two of you?" The man asked, eyeing Vernon with the slight tilt of his head, probably judging the man silently with his eye's on Vernon's choice of attire. Harry knew he was.

 

Harry grabbed Vernon's arm quickly, wrapping his own lean arms around it, which caused the handlebar mustache sporting dunderhead to wince a little from the unexpected and very much unwanted contact, as the boy hung on him. With the bar tender's attention shifting curiously to Harry did the boy say in the most childish tone he could muster. "Uncle Vermin is gonna help me buy school supplies for Hogwarts, do you think you could tell us where to go to get them?" A few adults looked at them then, one crone with a rotting front tooth chuckling at the boy's enthusiasm. The bartender only smiled and nodded his head, pointing past the table. "Of course, just go straight through the broom closet over there, would you like me to tap the wall to get you inside?" Harry only shook his head, in such a way that his spiked locks shook softly with the gesture. "That's ok, Daddy told me how, but thank you!" Harry pulled on Vernon's sleeve impatiently, leading him away from the bar. Harry let his childish demeanor drop the moment the door shut behind them. facing the brick wall, Harry reached out to tap it in a pattern. once the jagged bricks began to part and reshape themselves into an archway, Vernon flinched. Harry only stared in wide-eyed wonder at the sight of Diagon Alley revealing itself.

 

Vernon followed Harry, as the boy pulled the list out of his pocket. he could gawk later. showing such open emotions with Vernon in tow was never a good idea. he could do it on his own time. looking over the letter, there was a tiny map forming on it with highlighted areas on where to buy items, with a dot symbolizing where he currently was that moved with him. "Huh..useful." not even a minute down the crowded road had Gringotts come into view. Harry turned to face Vernon once standing in front of the bank, pointing up at him with a well-manicured finger, his bright jade polish shining brilliantly under the sun. "Alright, Vermin. you will wait right here, do not move from this spot." Harry didn't give Vernon a chance to respond, turning on his heel to push open the doors and step inside. Several middle-aged witches passed by Vernon, giggling and pushing each other whilst whispering about him with red tinted cheeks. "Such high cheekbones." "Do you think he's single?" "He's so skinny!" "He's hotter than Lockhart!" Vernon just folded his arms and grumbled bitterly under his breath about how he'd much rather be anywhere else than here, surrounded by freaks.

 

********************

Mandy wasn't exactly sure if 'Goblin' was the right word for these creatures, they looked far too much like overgrown Gremlins that were fed after midnight. several who were about a head shorter than Harry walked passed him pulling along a wagon filled with tightly lidded barrels, each probably full of gold or something. He fought down the urge to squee aloud at the many swarthy, clever faces. they were just so ugly, that they were cute. in that Sphynx cat sort of way. their pointed beards, very long fingers, and feet looked like they could shank someone. it was the only pointed quality about them that stopped Harry from reaching out to try and pet them.

Harry managed to maintain a straight face, with the slightest hint of redness to his cheeks, trying really hard to think about anything than the oversized sphynx cat look-alikes wearing suits. 'Focus on the nails, focus on the nails!' Harry screamed at himself internally. he didn't know why his mind wandered towards Lucius Malfoy in a dark green, fitted casino bunny girl outfit in the place of each goblin here, but it helped. he walked through what he guessed at some point had been a grand ballroom. The large, marble stone pillars were magnificent, the floors were well polished with small painted moving pictures on each tile, mostly of flowers fluttering in the breeze near the centers. it was beautiful. The chandeliers hanging in rows on the ceiling cast a dim glow that would have made the crustiest old crone look ten years younger, and even if there were thick spider webs on them they were lovely. He ignored the stares he received from the goblins seated at high desks weighing gold, finding himself standing before one who was currently studying him with a calculating gaze from over his long nose and spectacles. "Hello, I'm Harry Potter. I wish to make the with-" The Goblin waved a hand dismissively at the boy. "Yes, yes, I have been informed. Does Mr. Harry Potter have his key?" Or so the Gremlin look-alike asked, placing a grotesque hand on the edge of the desk, positioning himself in such a way where he'd get a better look at the boy. Harry nodded, holding it up so the smaller gent could get a good look at it. "Very well."

**********************

It was very hard being around all of this magic, and each time a simplest of a spell was cast around him had Vernon flinched, only to get looked at oddly by passerby's for it, it was as if these people thought he was the freak! In his opinion, it was the other way around. these people weren't natural, and every little thing they spoke about was a bunch of poppycock. they were the type of shabby looking, unruly folk one found wandering a Walmart parking lot, talking to themselves about ancient prophecy's God told them about over two-way radio's! a small growing crowd of oddly dressed, young ladies(From his own muggle perspective) that gathered behind him was not making his wait any easier. "E-excuse me, Ser? are you out here alone?" One with bright red frizzy hair asked, only for another young woman with two oversized front teeth to approach and giggle, lightly swatting the first's arm. "Oh Eliza, you sounded like a creep when you say that just now!" The first blushed out of embarrassment, then the ten young ladies who had been standing behind him took that as an invitation to try and jump into the conversation. a hand landed on his butt, which was just about enough for Vernon, as he began to shout. "Don't touch me you freak!" The red-clad man slapped a few hands away, turning to fast walk down an alleyway. which turned into running after a few seconds, the young giggly girls hot on his trail.

**********************

 

Harry was sitting on what appeared to be a large, old-fashioned Trolley Assisted Mine Cart gliding across two widespread metal rails. his hood had fallen, and his hair had blown out from where it had been tucked into the back of his cardigan, blowing wildly behind him. it almost felt like being on one of those kitty rollercoasters. The cart jerked to the left, then right passing several vaults, and for a moment Harry wondered just how many vaults were down here. The cart came to an abrupt stop. "Vault six hundred and eighty-seven." said the goblin who had steered the cart, with his oddly comical, nasally, yet squeaky voice. Steam wafted off the cart from a few pipes which function Harry did not know nor care to discover, as the tiny Goblin hopped off to stand in front of the boy with his arms outstretched. "Lamp please."

 

Grabbing the lamp by its handle, Harry lowered it into the Goblin's arms. a tiny squee escaped his lips, but the Goblin paid him no mind, assuming the child might have been excited to see the gold in his vault for the first time, the Goblin himself had almost squeed the first time seeing his own. Harry bit his bottom lip to stop himself from shouting 'Kawaii!', the lantern was half the little guy's size! with the noises the Goblin made while treading over to the vault, one might think he was carrying an armchair up a flight of stairs by himself! OH, IT WAS SO CUTE! AHH! Stepping off the cart to follow after the Goblin, they both stopped beside the vault. "Key please." Harry clamped down on his emotions, and exchanged the lamp for the key, positioning it over the little guy's shoulder so the Goblin could see what he was doing. The goblin pushed aside a gold engraved steel flap, putting the key in the hole to turn it counterclockwise. a loud click echoed throughout the cave. With the key in hand, the Goblin stepped aside. The Vault door creaking slowly open.

 

Harry nearly fell on his ass at the mere sight of just how much gold was inside his vault. buying a hundred mansions wouldn't even begin to put a dent in just how much was in here. "The Potter family must have been on some other shit when it came to running a business," Harry muttered, as he stepped forward, ignoring the amused snort that came from the Goblin, whilst pulling a tiny kitty head coin purse from his cardigan. back home, he had cast a feather charm, and a notice me not on the outside of the purse to prevent theft. within the rim, an undetectable extension charm was in place, having adjusted the size and length to that of a standard sized pillowcase. Stepping inside the Vault, did Harry start to fill his purse 'This alone should get me through seven school years with supplies, and then some.'

 

**********************************

Vernon shoved passed several people, attempting to escape the young ladies chasing after him, throwing an old man down on the ground in front of the herd in an attempt to slow them. The elderly man cried out, as several young ladies tripped over and fell on top of the man. While they were distracted, Vernon bolted inside of a shop and crouched, his man bun the only part of him peeking up from behind the glass window. The group of girls from before rushed down the street past him, and after a few seconds, Vernon rose just a smidge to see if the woman were gone. they were. Sighing out of relief, he stood there dusting off his red suit and turned to face the window when he felt eye's on him, noticing almost immediately how the elderly man from before was looking at him, whilst pushing himself off the ground with shaky elbows. there was enough disdain in their locked gaze to bottle!

The elder limped inside to point his wand at the fellow really hard. his rather luxurious, simple silk navy blue colored robes covered in several dirt shoe imprints, that came from being trampled on not too long ago fluttering some in his wake. The somewhat flattened hat which matched his robes in color, caved inward, as his silver spectacles were bent. a fresh darkening bruise just below his right green eye matched the small imprint of a back heel belonging to a high platform boot. his unkempt brows bunching together out of anger, as his thin lips curled when releasing a snarl. "EXTORTUS humerum!" (Another hex made up with English to Latin translator, meaning 'Dislocated shoulder' ) Vernon was struck, a loud pop filling the air, followed by the sound of his own screams. Vernon's head was spinning, as he found himself staggering against a shelf, knocking several vials of potions onto the floor. the shattered mix sizzled after Vernon vomits on them.

 

At that moment, the reasonably distraught, portly shopkeep, wearing black silk robes of Italian origin came in from the back room to stand behind the counter, his short black curls tousling with his movement as he waved his tan hands around angrily, shouting in what sounded like a very thick Italian accent. "HEY, are you two trying to cause a chemical explosion!? my shelves are stocked to the brim with Potions!" The rightfully angered Shopkeep's lavender eyes caught the mess on the floor where the potions spilled, his thick eyebrows shooting up into his very full, almost raven black hairline. The sizzling liquid on the floor exploded bright neon blue ooze on both the shopkeep and the elderly man, who both cried out in pain from the mixture which caused rapid building frostbite on where they had been struck. The elderly man fell to the floor, screaming loudly whilst holding his face which half had been frostbitten to shit. The old man's silver spectacles having been frozen to the side of his face. Vernon was wounded enough the first time, having fallen out of a dizzying wave of nausea, missing the brunt of blast entirely. The shopkeep wasn't so lucky. The entirety of the man's very masculine and angular shaped face was frozen, his almond shaped eye's bleeding tears from his ducts as he staggered into the backroom, slamming the door shut with his foot.

 

The neon blue ooze that struck the potions on the shelves began to sizzle, and Vernon managed to push himself off the floor and run behind the counter just in time for another potion to explode. The old man cried out again, his blood-curdling screams freezing Vernon in place as the spectacles on the elderly man melted into blistering flesh. the red ooze caught on fire after a few more seconds, making each Potion closest to it sizzle from the unneeded adjustment in heat. It was a very familiar sizzle, that Vernon learned very quickly, promised pain. The old man on the floor reached out for Vernon, begging for help. "It's too late for you, freak!" Vernon shouted, opening the door to the back room and stepping inside. The room's walls were made from the same brick in the leaky cauldron, it's flooring made up of a fine dark wood. large, elongated plain wooden bookshelves were positioned in such a way to match a library, each holding a plethora of different colored liquids in neat rows on its shelves. The shopkeep lay still on his side in a heap on the floor, his eye's and once flowery petaled pink lips frostbitten shut as his hands were stuck to his face. the frost was continuously stretching past the tips of his fingers. his expression one of pure agony. Several explosions could be heard from the shop behind Vernon, followed by the elderly man's screams. Vernon stepped over the shopkeep's lifeless body, bolting to the glass door leading outside, and pushes it open. he tripped a few times, fighting off more dizzying waves of nausea before finding his footing, bolting down the back alley.

 

**********************************

Harry stepped out of the bank with a big grin on his face. his hair tucked back from under his hood, and the kitten purse was filled with gold, sitting safely in one of the many pockets on his very complicated outfit. with the Hogwarts letter in hand, Harry wondered what shop he should go to first. looking down at the map of the area on said letter, did he begin to wonder. Harry looked around for Vernon's eye-searing red suit, but no such suit was in sight, however, a very familiar hooked nose caught Harry's eye that made him forget about Vernon altogether. This specific passerby's shoulder-length, greasy black hair that's texture came from absorbing the many fumes from cauldrons all day, framing his face in curtains which swayed with his current strut, much like the dashing man's usual robes when walking the halls of Hogwarts. Today, however, those long robes were absent, probably so the crowd wouldn't step on them. Snape wore a fitted frock that brought out his curves and voluptuous posterior, his lips curling as he stared down at his own list held in a willowy hand with those dark, penetrating eyes that resembled a dark tunnel, a one-way tunnel that Harry wouldn't mind losing himself in.

 

Unable to help himself, the boy chose to follow behind from afar, moving from behind cart to cart when pursuing Snape. it might have been risky, but from between a few people, had he angled his finger, casting a wandless 'Amor ICTUS' (A slapping Hex the author made up from an English to Latin translator on Google, meaning 'Love Tap') at just the right time from behind a newspaper cart, hitting the head of Slytherin square on the arse. a loud slap echoed throughout this section of the alley, followed by an undignified, startled yelp from the Potion Master's lips. The sound was priceless, and the murderous look on the Professor's face sent shivers down Harry's spine, most pleasantly so.'He's so hot when he's angry.' Harry mused as he watched Severus scan the crowd for the perpetrator with his eyes. the people passing by stared at him oddly, giving him a wide berth. Harry could only cover his mouth and giggle. The vendor of the cart Harry was hiding behind held a newspaper over his slightly wrinkled mouth, attempting to stifle he owns giggles at one of the most bizarre occurrences he's seen all day. once the potions master turned to storm off with a scowl, from being unable to pinpoint the exact location as to where the spell came from, as well as who it might have been due to the sheer amount of people in the alley, Harry made his escape.

 

Harry didn't stop running, and took several turns, giggling all the way with glee. He stopped to bend and place his well-manicured hands on his knee's, catching his breath. "Wooh! so worth it." He spoke with a grin, bringing himself to a stand after several seconds, noting he was in a very desolate alley. Eyeing the odd shops around him curiously, he pulled the Hogwarts letter from his pocket, opening it to take a peek at where exactly he was. "Knockturn Alley..." Harry scanned the map with his eye's so he might find a route leading back to Gringotts when soft cries brought him from doing so. but Harry noticed they weren't just any old cries, they sounded childlike. Mandy's internal instincts kicked in and decided to follow them. After a few sharp turns had he found the source hiding behind a few barrels, in the form of a little girl dressed in shabby dark plum robes who was sitting on her knee's facing the wall with her small pale hands brought up to cover her face. The girl's shoe soles looked worn, and a clear dried substance peeking out from between a crack of her right shoe told Mandy, that they have probably been super glued several times over. A muggle-born in Knockturn? if that wasn't reckless....what stuck out the most, however, was the little girl's eggplant purple hair.

 

the sound of his footsteps startled the girl to a gasp and looked back at him from her hands, her bright brown eyes glistening with moisture. Mandy noticed those doe brown eyes puffy and red from having cried for what Mandy could have guessed was a long while judging from how red the little girl's eyes were. she was an extremely pretty little girl, one with a freckled complexion, and looking at her size she was probably two or three years younger than him. "Hey, what's a cute little kitten like you doing out here in the middle of smelly Knockturn Alley?" Harry asked softly, kneeling, all the while pulling a pink handkerchief from one of his many complicated pockets to offer it to her. he watched her turn to face him, searching his face with a calculating gaze and a sniffle that would make even the toughest of men squee. Harry allowed her this time to get used to him, and after a few seconds of silence, she accepted the handkerchief with a soft smile of her own and wiped her eyes with it.

 

"M-my big brother Ron pulled a nasty prank on me, turning my hair purple. I ran away from him, and now I don't know where I am." Harry only nodded, rising to his feet with an extended hand. "Well, I happen to have a map with me. if you get off the floor, there, I can help you look for him." the girl hesitated, as more tears gathered in her eyes. "But my hair." She croaked. Harry's heart melted right there, this little girl was adorable, like a little-lost-kitten! "Don't worry, I know a simple misplacement charm that will fix it." The girl blushed at his smile, and placed her hand in his, allowing the older boy to hoist her to her feet. "I would like that.." She muttered shyly, and Harry couldn't take it anymore. he squeed. "DAWWW, your so cute~" The girl only blushed and looked down at the floor, as Harry pat her head. Schooling his features, he lowered his hood, bringing his hands up to untuck his long hair from his cardigan. the little purple-haired girl could only stare in awe. Harry brought his hands up, and both wandlessly and wordlessly performed the charm, tapping her head with his hand and then his own.

 

Harry's hair became a bright eggplant purple, as the little girl's natural hair color had been restored to its vibrant orange. Harry clapped his hands together, wearing a cheery smile. "There, all better." holding a fiery red lock of shoulder length hair in her hand, did the girl look down at it with a bashful smile. "Thank you.." she paused, afore glancing up to watch Harry tuck his hair back into his hooded cardigan. "But what about your hair?" Harry only shrugged, truly touched by the girl's concern. what a cutie~ "It's all good." Harry raised a hand mere inches from his lips, leaning beside the redhead as if to share gossip with her. "in case you haven't noticed, my style is a little on the eccentric side." The girl giggled at the silly expression on Harry's face, as he began to back out of her personal space with his features softening. "it will be fine, the after effect of pranks tend to wear off eventually." or so the boy finished, pulling out the Hogwarts letter from a pocket. Harry panicked behind schooled features, for the letter had his name on it. he pretended it had slipped from his hand, dropping it on the ground. quickly, he knelt to smear dirt from a nearby flower pot over his name with a thumb, his back hiding what he had been doing. "Whoops, butterfingers~" the girl giggled at the strange boy, and Harry rose with the paper, beckoning the girl over with a finger. she followed, meekly extending a hand. "I'm Ginevra Weasley by the way, but everybody just calls me Ginny, what's your name?" Harry looked down at her palm for a second, and smiled, reaching across to shake her hand softly. "Mandy Mathews, it's nice to meet you, Ginny~"

 

A large explosion from a few blocks over shook the earth under their very feet, followed by the sounds of several screams off into the distance. Ginny placed her hands on Harry's shoulder to better balance herself. "W-hat was that?!" Ginny stammered, letting her hands drop at her sides, appearing reasonably distressed. "An explosion of some kind by the sound of it, though I'm sure the Aurors will take care of it." Mandy turned to face Ginny and reached out to place a hand on her shoulder, also appearing distressed, though for an entirely different reason being that he was worried about the safety of his newly adopted Chick, even if the chick didn't know that bit yet. "Let's go to the leaky cauldron, this brother of yours with has to pass back through there to get home, yeah? Plus it will be a lot safer." Ginny took five steps back and shook her head, clutching a fist full of plum robes around the front of her chest. "But what if my big brother is over there!? I'm sorry, Mandy, but I have to go see! he might need my help!" Harry tried to grab Ginny's hand and argue what good a young girl could do against whatever caused such a great explosion, but the girl was fast and before he knew it she was getting farther and farther away. "Ginny!" Harry called out, running after her. not only twenty large steps into his chase and Vernon rushes passed them while clutching his shoulder. Harry scowled, making a sharp U-turn in the idiot's direction. "Damnit, Vernon!" Harry shouted in Parseltongue, giving the man chase. casting a quick Incarcerous spell, Ropes fastened tightly around Vernon's body, causing him to fall with a loud thud, his dislocated shoulder popping several times. Vernon cried out in pain. "Silencio!" Harry sneered, kicking Vernon in the ribs.

 

"I. thought. i. told. you. to. stay. put. HUMAN!" Harry grit out between kicks, his hair hanging over his enraged eye's, his shoulders heaving with labored breaths. taking a moment to regain his composure, he stood up straight, bringing his hand up to run his fingers through eggplant purple charmed locks. "No matter, I'm going to put you in a corner somewhere, and you will stay put this time or else your punishment will be a lot worse than it already is!" Vernon sobbed silently, looking up at Harry with fear in his eye's, muttering silent apologies that no one could hear. The boy cast a feather charm on the man, kneeling to heave Vernon up and over a shoulder with ease. walking to the spot he found Ginny, Harry placed the man behind a few dusty crates. "I'll question you later.." marking where he was on his map with a piece of mud, Harry decided to rush after Ginny.

 

He had pretty good idea as to who might have caused all that destruction and none of this happened in the books or movie because Vernon was not here. It had to be Vernon, the man must have said something to someone to instigate a problem of some kind that had lead up to all of this. it had to be it, the guy hated magic like neo nazi's hate the homosexuals! because of Vernon, he had left Ginny to run into the line of fire. literally. he wouldn't have normally, in good conscience, leave a child to run headfirst into disaster, but it wasn't like he could cast a hex on her and obliviate her memories away. Ginny was just a child, a very small one at that, that Harry wasn't going to cast such a powerful spell on out of fear it might harm the child long term. no wee child deserved that! Plus, he couldn't just let Vernon go. Vernon was his responsibility in a sense. he shouldn't have to be, but he is. Harry wouldn't be able to get anything done either with that nuisance on the loose. "really! how hard is it to stand around in front of a bank for twenty minutes?!"

 

Hopefully, the Weasley family were all as boneheaded as Ginny. that way, they would think Ginny is in the same place that Ginny Assumes they are in and rush down there to help like GINNY wants to help them! "Gryffindors.." Harry grumbled, eying the thick smoke wafting up into the sky with both frustration at Vernon and fear for the girl's well-being flaring in his chest, his heart beating a mile a minute.

**************************************************

Several Aurors were on the scene around the fire, having detained it with a barrier only seconds ago to prevent both the fumes and explosions from affecting the wizarding public. Already fifteen people were on floating stretchers and being transferred to st. Mungo's. The large chemical explosion was too far out of their control to do much else, and investigations could not yet take place due to the intensity of said fumes and ongoing explosions. Rita Skeeter was flying overhead as a beetle, eavesdropping on the conversations between each Auror, coming to the conclusion that they would just have to ride it all out and strengthen the barrier in place when it began to wane, every three hours on the hour. but even with an investigation, Rita knew all the chemicals would have no doubt rid the scene of evidence they could use to make sense of what happened here. it was perfect opportunity to play fill in the blanks when spinning a juicy story!

***************************************************

Ginny stood amongst a crowd of people who gathered in the Alley, watching the smoke and embers rise into the sky but never passing the bubble like-barrier in place. "Ginny!" "Ginny!" Came the shrill shout of one Molly Weasley, shoving passed several people. "Mum!" Ginny called back, turning around to see her mother rushing for her. Ginny was pulled towards the woman's chest tightly, tears welling in her eyes. "Where were you! Are you hurt!?" She croaked, kneeling to take hold of her daughter's limbs, riding up her sleeves to search for any signs of damage. "I'm fine, Mum, I'm not hurt I promise!" Arthur came around with Ron in tow, looking very much relieved. "We were worried about you." Ron looked sheepishly down at the ground, rubbing his arm. "Ronald has something to say to you, don't you son?" Ron looked over at Ginny from his disappointed father, indecision flashing across his slightly paler than usual freckled features. "I'm sorry, Ginny." Ginny ran over to wrap her arms around her brother's neck, hugging him tightly. "I forgive you, just don't do it again!"

Harry eyed Ginny from a distance. with a relieved sigh, did Mandy turn her back on the family to look down at the list in his hands. "Maybe now I can shop in peace."


	16. Diagon Alley trip part 2 of 2.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So the shopping trip continues! oh, train.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Harry and Draco have a wizard fight in the next chapter.

with a basket handle over his arm, Harry finished looking over the odd potion ingredients he'd no doubt be using in Snape's class. seriously, some of this stuff was downright unusual in his opinion. Crow's eyes? how the hell did anyone know they needed that particular thing in their Cauldron? how do you even come to the conclusion that you need animal parts for a potion in the first place? Harry tried to imagine a scenario where some old fart tired of crows pestering him while he brewed outside one evening, zapping one right out of the sky, only for bits of the Crow to fall in his cauldron by chance, creating some sort of new fancy concoction. "Yeah, that's probably how it happened.." or so Harry told himself, twirling a lock of his long bangs fastened by a ribbon around a finger. 

 

the potions shop in Diagon Alley exploded, meaning the one in Knockturn alley had to do for now. Granted there were plenty throughout Diagon Alley, according to Lily's journals, but the closest on the map he was given was in Knockturn where he left Vernon behind a few barrels somewhere. he didn't want to be too far away from Vernon either, afraid that if he left the muggle unattended for more than a few hours, some shady individual might come along and harvest dear Vernon's organs for questionable dark wizard activities, so without further delay, had Harry cast a few charms on himself to blacken his teeth and turn one eye a disgustingly abnormal shade of white, giving those around him the impression that he belonged in that dirty Alley, while proceeding to browse Knockturn's many shops for his the remaining school supplies. He had textbooks at home that belonged to Lilly Evans, therefore he didn't need to worry about the many academic reading materials required of him to have. 

 

It wasn't like the fishy looking Alley didn't have anything the first one didn't anyway, in fact, the only distinguishing qualities between the two alley's Harry could find, whilst using Lily's journal as a point of reference, was the wider selection of dark books, ingredients, and or items of questionable origin, and all the shady looking people acted reasonable and relaxed around you when they think you are just as physically flawed and unhygienic looking as they are. with a few glances he's made at people with that white eye, and flashing the most endearing blackened smile at the older ladies, they often smiled back and went on with their business. some even waved or nodded to acknowledge him. imagine that.

 

The store clerk behind the counter in the Potions shop known as 'Brewing death' smiled at the boy, showing off teeth that looked as if the guy had been chewing rocks in place of tobacco for the past thirteen years, his overall appearance akin to Argus Filch and snake-faced Voldemort's love child if there were ever to be one, his robes a dark prune in color and the clerk was so polite! well, he was polite when Harry pulled seven Galleons from his pocket to his hand. the man convinced that Harry had money to burn, even going so far as to explain just what different cauldrons and stirring rods such as glass and silver do to improve the quality of certain brews. the man didn't even shy away from showing the boy all of the questionable books that he was selling when asked about the dusty reading materials lined on shelves along the walls. books that the man claimed would aid whatever the child chose to brew better than those textbooks he remembered using when he himself started going to school. Harry's overall opinion of the man, was that he liked him very much and would be shopping here for all of his brewing needs in the foreseeable future. 

 

He had spent over five hundred Galleons in that shop, mostly on utensils of the best quality to brew with. buying both Basic Cauldrons of excellent quality and those more suited towards endurance when treading dangerously close to the dark side of Potion Making. Harry wouldn't have gone the extra mile if the man hadn't pulled a book from one of his shelves that showed him how to charm his cauldron and utensils in a protective layer of magic that wouldn't ruin his equipment when gunking up a potion. Harry was shopping for Quality over Quantity here, just as he had when Mandy Mathews in a life once passed. these supplies would last him a good long while. after thanking the man kindly, had Harry used 'Reducio' to shrink his purchased products down, and cast feather charms on them before tucking them safely away in plush little ring bags that the clerk suggested in place of shopping bags if he was going to use those charms. "You've helped me tremendously, Sir. Thank you." The man only smiled and replied with. "Please, son, call me Bitty, I think you've earned the right to use my name as my second best customer, what with how you spent five hundred Galleons here today." Harry nodded his head, acknowledging the man. "Mandy Mathews, it was a pleasure to do business with you, Bitty. " Harry offered his hand, trying his best to sound like Commander Cullen Rutherford. Bitty returned the shake, squeezing the boy's hand firmly with an unpleasant rotting grin. "Yes. yes. Come back anytime, Mandy." Harry nodded again, returning the smile with his own, afore turning to walk out of the shop. "Goodbye." wondering just who Bitty's first best customer was, a certain 'Choice ass' by the name of Severus Snape strut passed him with a slight limp, leaving an earthy scent in his wake with the smallest hint of whatever he must have been brewing that day. It wasn't at all unpleasant. "Evening," Harry called out, winking up at the man with a jade green eye to better draw attention to his pitch white charmed eye, giving him a wide black grin when heading out the door. a swell of pride filling his chest knowing that 'He' caused that slight limp in snape's step. What Harry envisioned as a walking sex god, only arched a curious brow down at the child afore passing the boy and entering the shop. "Cousin of yours, Bitty?" Severus asked silkily. Well, that answered Harry's question as to who the first best customer was. Harry couldn't help but shiver at the sound of that delicious Voice Severus has! 'It's even better in person!' or so he thought, unable to fight a squee. 

 

********************

 

Harry had been purchasing anything else he might have needed from shops around Knockturn alley for a good forty minutes after buying supplies from Bitty, the people were surprisingly decent when they assumed you were a well-educated half-blood boy with an interest in the dark arts. which he was strongly portraying to all those he's come across, including the store clerks who eyed him skeptically, often asking him questions about himself, while the boy held the false formal demeanor of Commander Cullen Rutherford from dragon age. Harry had plenty of practice pretending to be someone he wasn't, the moment Mandy became Harry, or how he had to play the role of a demon in front of the Dursleys. Harry would have to play pretend again when going to Hogwarts though not by much. Perhaps he could just act like Solas and disapprove with everyone to the point they threw their hands up and left him alone. 

 

Harry's current choice in attire certainly backed up his answers full of half-truths, passing off as custom robes befitting of a young dark wizard in the making. Mandy might have damn well been one, what with how much he used Crucio on Vernon. dark magic was helpful, and with how much of a rat's ass Mandy gave about good and evil... no, there wasn't even such a thing among wizards in Harry's opinion, the simplest of spell conflicted with nearly every muggle moral out there sides a select few. It was one big sea of gray here, and Harry would do whatever he damn well needed to, to survive and protect those he cared about. The ministry could go eat a big fat dick if they thought he would be following any of their rules.

 

Harry found the plethora of pockets on his very complicated outfit were starting to feel full, but not full enough. he needed to find out if these people had bath bombs! he couldn't imagine how beautiful they would be or what they might do if the wizarding world had them. it excited him to no end. what would the adult novels be like? oh, he had to go look at those! there was so much to see! Before heading out of Knockturn Alley, he checked on Vernon who was sleeping. Casting both a Silencio and a Notice me not charm on the barrels and crates the man was snoozing behind, had Harry decided to go look at some bath products in Diagon Alley before he took Vernon home. 

 

Glancing up at the sky did Harry smirk. he made bank, got to both ogle and slap some choice ass, met some nice people and managed to get all his school supplies before the deadline. Today was a good day. 

**********************************************************

September, first, 1991.

Harry stood in front of the Hogwarts Express, wearing his favorite fit minimalistic white top with the high collar, and long finger sleeves. his soft, heavy knitted, asymmetric ribbed shawl with a high collar over it chased away the chill the morning brought. the smooth neoprene minimalistic two faced baggy trousers comfy enough for sitting hours on end in, as were the techno neoprene dotted high-top boots, which closed by a side zipper comfortable enough to stand in. his favorite smooth neoprene visor hat hiding his scar well, as his calf length, high rose scented ponytail were peeking out from the hole on the back of the hat, swaying along the strip of fabric that allows one to tighten the hat around one's head if need be. (Visual for outfit here https://www.demobaza.com/top-lines-dimension )his front, custom placed pockets were filled with his both shrunken, and feather charmed belongings. his kitten purse in one of them. The longer sections of his bangs hanging from the opposing ends of his face, dangling over the knit were tied near the tips with neon white ribbons. Kitty has wrapped herself around his neck over the knit, just looking around at everything. Kitty had been charmed to both deliver and receive his mail from here on out much like the other familiars, which enhanced Kitty's body in such a way where she wouldn't tire when out and about with letters as well as easily maneuver around any obstacle she might come across to get letters where they need to be. it was a clever, and easy little binding spell that the Hogwarts letter made sure to include underneath the list of what will be needed. how the charm would show kitty where she needed to go to deliver these letters, Harry did not know but would ask if he remembered to eventually. 

 

The book he bought from Bitty had been clutched tightly to his chest, the cover charmed to read 'Cinderella' in the title, because he sure as hell couldn't walk around with a title like.. 'Prepping your cauldron for the darkest of brews' Several children were already starting to pour into the train as the doors slid open. Harry wondered just what he would do to survive at Hogwarts. whatever he planned to do, Dumbles would probably find out about it and try to meddle. Harry was better off making each decision with a strong unpredictability because even the most intelligent fictional characters like Batman had trouble dealing with the unexpected. Boarding the train himself, had he started to look around for a compartment to sit in. A familiar head of short, platinum blonde hair passing him by. Kitty reached out to bap and bite at the boy's hair, messing it up with her paws, purring loudly. Draco scowled at the cat, his metaphorical feathers were ruffled! so ruffled, that the youngest Malfoy turned around to give whoever owned the familiar a strong word or two, but it proved to be a bit difficult under the heavy flow of students pouring into the train carts that pushed him along. all he could do was raise a bunched fist, and call out. "Nice familiar, girly boy." Harry just raised his middle finger high into the air so the little prat could see it, unaware and uncaring of the death glare that he received in return. the little blonde boy was swept away by the current of students.


	17. BAM

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Random picture before Monday's post.

Not even Voldemort can resist dat fabulous booty.

 

 


	18. You wanna have a wizard fight?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wizard fight!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, first of all. 104 kudos?! Holy shit! thank you guys~ Secondly, how long do you think it will take Harry to realize he forgot to buy a wand? 
> 
> This chapter is a little short because I'm currently working on the story Half and Half. the next will be longer because the plot demands it. Mostly Dumbledork Pov, as well as Snape pov.

The fur on Kitty's back began to rise, as she let out a hiss, digging her claw's onto the front of Harry's very complicated looking trousers covering the front of his thighs. the compartment door had been slammed open and standing in the doorway was Draco Malfoy. his shoulders were hunched, while his hands had slid up the smooth rims of the compartment's door frame. his expression one of frustration mixed with embarrassment if that blush stretching across his alabaster complexion, as well as the flamboyant giggles directed at the blonde from an open compartment across from them, were anything to go by. the youngest Malfoy's usually tidy hair looked as if it had been whipped around by a hurricane, distracting Harry from the boy's simple, yet elegant lavender robes. originally Harry might have giggled at the boy's hair too, but for an entirely different reason. which was 'Chibi Malfoy looks like a baby chick with wispy feathers poking out of his head.' but instead, Harry found himself wincing from the pain he felt from having Kitty's shit-under-the-nail-claws digging into his flesh.

 

"Hey! I do not appreciate having my familiar startled in such a way, you powdered wig wearing shitlord!" Kitty hid behind Harry's leg's, as he stood up to the prat with his right foot forward, whilst waving a finger at the boy. his opposing hand residing on his hip. The sound of the train doors closing echoed throughout the train, but the boys were too invested in each other's unwanted company to notice. Draco had drawn his wand, pointing it at Harry's face. "Why you litt-" Chibi Malfoy paused stumbling at the train's abrupt departure. Harry let the movement guide him against Draco, wasting no time snatching the boy's wrist, attempting to take away the wand. Draco only grunted as their bodies slammed together, trying to force the wand's point in Harry's direction in an attempt to cast a nasty hex. their strength was evenly matched. "You wanna have a wizard fight or something!?" Harry grit out, to which Draco replies with"It's called a duel you buffoo-Oof!"Harry's knee rose to hit Draco against the crotch, making the prat release his hold on the wand. Harry threw it across the cart and tackled the boy to the ground of their compartment, his long black ponytail fluttering down with him as if a ribbon and grazed over the youngest Malfoy's face. 

 

Harry straddled the boy, pinning Draco's arms above his head. Draco hardly puts up a fight, having been winded and groans with his eye's clenched shut. Harry knew he didn't have much energy left either after that skirmish and made a mental note to put on some more muscle later. Sliding his thumb over Draco's wrist he pressure pointed the boy, knocking him out cold. the sound of giggles and whispers brought him from his current situation and glanced up at the cart across from him to find at least five girls looking at him. going by the goofy grins and pink tinted cheeks, he had a good idea of what they were whispering to each other about. the realization as to how straddling the Malfoy Heir might have looked kicking in faster than you could say 'supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!' Harry's face tinted red from the number of this misunderstanding's excuses that would no doubt be brushed aside more disbelievingly than the situation at hand and decided not to defend himself. it would only make him look worse. so instead, he reached over to slide the door shut and pulled the curtains over the glass window without moving from his spot. 

 

Looking down at the unconscious boy, he couldn't help but think that the little terror looked peaceful. Harry cast a feather charm on prat, and got off of him, kneeling to pick him up and lay him down on the seat across from where he was sitting before the chaos. Kitty jumped up by Draco's head and started eating the boy's hair. Harry couldn't help but snicker. "Good, you eat his hair, I'll draw a dick on this prick's forehead!" pulling a pink sharpie from his pocket, did he kneel and begin drawing the veiniest dick he could, giggling all the while.


	19. Dumbles Pov.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just as the title says, I'm not gonna make it a long chapter after all cuz I'm not feeling up to it. Severus pov will be in the next chapter tho, I already have half of it written out.

Dumbledore felt relaxed, having cast a cushion charm on himself before leaning back against the uncomfortable worn velveteen tacked onto a bulky wood chair at the dining hall, a chair that belonged the first superintendent of Hogwarts that wouldn't be replaced anytime soon due to the strict tradition established by the founders of the school regarding the antique piece of furniture. he was wearing an eye-searing, brilliant purplish silk wizarding robe covered in tiny sterling moons to give others the impression that he was an inoffensive(Depending on who was in his presence) fun-loving old man who liked to dress up for the kids and wordlessly to moderately bother anybody with a stick up their collected arse. but if he was being completely honest with himself, those were just the bonuses that came with his lack of fashion expertise. 

 

much like those forty-five-year-old muggle men who purchased neon embellished shirts and wore them out and about, much to their wives annoyance. he did not care how he presented himself so long as what he had on were comfortable and covered the entirety of his soft wrinkled body. but that's beside the point, he is old, and shouldn't have to fret over something like fashion when managing a bunch of children for as long as he has. if anything, it eased the tension between him and the youngsters whenever one might get sent up to his office for whatever reason. it was pretty difficult to feel frightened by a man clad in bright neon robes offering you candy. until he flared his magic. but he wouldn't dare do that since these were children he was dealing with, not dark lords. perhaps future dark lords depending on the house, but that was a different concern entirely, one he will not dwell on at the moment, not before the first big feast of the year. no, instead he will patiently wait for the students to finish pouring into the dining hall while inwardly savoring the results of the nonverbal provoking that his choice in attire unintentionally brings to Severus, who by the way is seated a few chairs down from him at the moment with a scowl on his face. 

 

Dumbledore brings his well-moisturized fingers up to stroke his beard, the top half of a very long and curly beard held in order by a unique silver ribbon that's etched on glitters strengthen the needed grip to ensure it wouldn't slide about, as he pretends to ponder about something of great significance. his eye's twinkling with false naiveté, as he looks to Minerva after sensing her stare at the side of his face, trying not to giggle at her all-knowing gaze. she eyes both Severus and himself, only to snort and shake her head disbelievingly at the two afore turning her attention to Professor Flitwick who started talking about a new charm he formulated that might just do something or another. Dumbledore didn't really pay attention to whatever it was being said, and not because was an arsehole, but because he's probably heard about whatever Flitwick was talking about the day before today. The short wizard would talk about something one day, and forget he ever talked about it in the first place the next and repeat what he already spoke about in perfect detail. it was entertaining the first few times it started to happen just last year, but now it was turning into a kind of sad and unintentional hint from Flitwick that the short wizard might be developing altimeters. it was a good thing St. Mungo's had a potion for that sort of thing, or else he might have had to let the man go. 

 

Looking underneath the table at the curved tips of his pointed slippers, he thought about Harry. he expected half the fallen soul of a very powerful dark wizard to come waltzing through those doors, after hearing about how the child single-handedly wiped the minds of every muggle in his neighborhood just under a month with hardly any mishaps using wandless magic, or how Harry performed several dark spells that could have landed the child in Azkaban for casting or the entirely separate charge of performing illegal curses and hexes on the Muggle, Vernon Dursley. it brought several questions and theories as to how the child knew a chant which healed bone-deep wounds inflicted by large canines and so much more. It was frustrating to Dumbledore because he was used to knowing everything! what he did know, was that the boy's ability to speak Parseltongue didn't have anything to do with this past life Harry lived, no. the ability to speak the language of snakes came with having been one of Voldemort's Horcrux's. The fact that such a skill would surface only after being killed was just fascinating and made the old wizard theorize that the boy might have known how to speak it the moment the child was made a Horcrux but just didn't know, but then when did he know? it was possible he could have at some point spoken to snakes in his aunt's garden. 

 

The child had a hand in driving Petunia to her death and took over the household, turning it into a nightmare for those inside, willing rose bush vines up the walls inside and outside the house. it made Dumbledore think for the longest time that he made the wrong choice by sending Harry to the Dursleys. that he created another Tom Riddle, but then Minnie showed him through her memories, the roundabout mercy Harry showed Dudley immediately after Petunia's death. The following memories of Harry's once chubby cousin who was not quite an innocent before but has turned into under Harry's watchful eye over the next few years. it showed Dumbledore that Harry had a heart, a large one that softened the child's expression whenever the boy thought no one was looking. that soft expression Harry would give Dudley when his cousin's back was turned, the way Harry treated his cats with care, or whenever he was alone with his nose stuck in his mother's diary, her books, her journals..whenever Harry held a photograph of Severus from Lily's journal littered with lipstick stains the color of whatever rogue the boy chose to wear that day. Harry was no Tom Riddle, but a cunning survivor with ambition. half a damaged soul in one small body, but not beyond repair.. if not, the boy would be swayed, even if he had to blackmail Harry using with the many bottled memories pulled from Minerva of the boy using unforgivables on Vernon Dursely, that was sitting on a shelf above his pensive. each vile he could threaten to hand over to the right people in the Ministry at any given time should the boy ever tell him 'No' or step out of line. 

 

It shouldn't come to that, but if it does, he will be ready. Dumbledore's final conclusion was that the once wandering half of Harry's soul became a strong young witch between the ages of fifteen and twenty, of American origin due to Harry's accent and slang from the start that's morphed to fit the region with time. perhaps Asian American due to the Chinese and Japanese the boy rarely spoke when by himself, or just how the boy knew Kyusho-Jitsu when defending himself. there was no dark wizard fitting such a description in America, so this told the headmaster that half of Harry's soul must have been floating around a different a dimension. who's to say it wasn't several? it would explain why he knew three languages if you took out parseltongue. if so, just how different were these dimensions? when were these dimensions? how many times did the remaining half of Harry's soul jump bodies? how many times did it become a wizard? is the boy aware of each awakening within a body not his own? A pair of soft lips brushed across the old headmaster's silver-gilt spectacles, bringing him out of a headache-inducing thought process that swarmed within the walls of his cranium like a hoard of aggravated bumblebees. Minnie's thin hand had found its way to his left shoulder, resting there as she had leaned over to speak softly against his ear. "I better go nab the first years from Hagrid."


	20. Bam! #2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I made this in photoshop just a few minutes ago and thought I might share it, enjoy my first attempt at photoshop ever. x'D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another photo bomb.

mmm yas, added his wand in there too. 


	21. Severus Pov.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the title reads. next chapter I will write out what happened in the cart when Draco woke up in an epic flashback chapter of blooming friendship between Hermoine and Harry. why Minnie didn't wipe the glittery dick away will be explained too. or why no one removed it really. It's an easy guess though. ***I forgot some parts of this chapter, that I made drunk-ish and saved on another writing program. here they are. heheh. whoops~***

Severus sat a few seats down from the headmaster, having propped his right elbow up on the table with his chin resting on the palm of his hand, his cauldron stained fingertips occasionally brushing across his right cheek bone, the opposing set drumming lazily along the table. a small clump of his long sleek hair slid over an eye, hair which smelled strongly of the large batch of pepper up potion he finished brewing thirty minutes ago for Madam Pomfrey, the fumes from the brew having blended with his hair's texture, creating an oil slick residue he was in no hurry to rinse with a long well deserved hot bath. he hadn't the time, and even if he did, his talents were always needed in this school at the most random and or unusual of hours of the day. there was no point in washing his hair after every single brew when he might be called an hour or even fifteen minutes after restoring the cleanliness to his hair. it's happened before. Lucius, his once mentor throughout school, and dear friend had been kind enough to lend him the coin needed for a few books containing charms that kept the residue from building up in his hair when brewing during his youth, but the effects tended to wear off thirty minutes into a project, and he was too focused on the accuracy which came with each timed step when brewing nothing but perfection to re-apply the same charm thrice or even five times each session.

 

 

 

the wrinkles on his forehead bunch shortly after turning his head, sending the ugliest scowl he could muster towards a certain neon-clad headmaster, because, really. the fool is the headmaster of Hogwarts, he had an example to set and a reputation to uphold, mostly in front of the board of directors, and students who undoubtedly tell their parents every little nonsensical thing that happens at their magical boarding school. no one in their right mind would ever take the man seriously when hearing of or having to go through the discomfort of seeing the man dressed in such a way in a trained bureaucratic atmosphere, or at least they shouldn't, but they do. it irritated Severus to no end, and even more so whenever he brought up these reasonably valid concerns to the headmaster that he'd been thinking on then and now, just spoken aloud, only to be met with something like 'Why that's the point, my boy.' followed by an outlandish, but thoughtful speech he could not argue with even if he tried, about bringing a false sense of security or freedom from pain and anxiety to muggle born, half blood and pure blood children's lives during their metamorphosis into bright young wizards and witches by dressing and acting in such away. to go so far as to make sure their time at Hogwarts is pleasurable as each class is insightful. all before they have to face the often times, harsh realities or lives their peers expected from them at the start. the subtle hint of what awaits being graduation, that the children must consider or think about all on their own to truly spread their wings and fly from the nest, to forgo the crutch being their teachers coat tails so they may walk on their own as adults. Dumbledore was the only man he knew to make something so foolish sound brilliant.

 

 

 

Another thing that irked Severus, was the fact the old coot could successfully pull it off where others would be shunned or scolded for their state of dress when speaking to those of the Wizengamot at the Ministry headquarters. he knew and was pretty sure Dumbledore knew too, that most of them wanted to openly complain about it, but refrained because attempting to battle against the headmaster's wit would result in failure, or humiliation on whoever was foolish enough to think they could win an argument against Dumbledore's brilliance. Severus didn't think it escaped Shacklebolt's notice how the headmaster's robes become brighter around those select, tight-lipped few with each encounter after the first bottled complaint were muffled by a bottom lip biting gesture. the shine both Dumbledore and Shacklebolt had in their eye's when glancing at each other shortly after made it clear to almost all, yet unable to be proven, that they both enjoyed mildly annoying people and went to great lengths to do it.

 

 

 

no one could prove the headmaster had one devious bone in his body, either, what with how manipulative the man was. but if you personally knew him, or some of the often times twisted and dangerous things that he planned, like hiding the bloody philosophers stone in a friggin school for children when it had been perfectly safe at Gringotts... Severus was brought from his musings at Minnie's chuckles, as she looked between the two, shaking her head. his cheeks tinted red, brought on by the outwardly childish reasoning other's assumed he had to glare in the first place. he grumbled as Quirrell who was sitting beside a bubbly Flitwick, only smiled at him sheepishly, fingering the edge of a fork on the table.

 

 

Severus turned his head sharply away from them to eye the dining hall's thousands of candles that cast a soothing dim light within the dining hall, allowing himself to remember the bright-eyed excitement such a simple levitation spell brought Lily and himself when they first walked through the dining hall. the candles floated midair over four long tables, where second-year students through seventh, were seated chatting amongst themselves. Severus glanced over at the Slytherin table, scowling at one of his second-year students who had a finger up their nose! oh, the disgust coursing through his veins right now!

 

 

if he hadn't been purposely showing favoritism towards those in Slytherin out of needed necessity brought on by being a double agent for the light, well. he'd throw whatever it is he had in his hand at the child, and take fifty points....at least one of his snakes seated beside the little animal had the decency to offer a tissue. Severus felt the side of his face twitch, for another late evening were being ruined by children and troubled ponderings over old nincompoops! he was getting too worked up over this, and tried looking somewhere else, anywhere else, the tables couldn't possibly frustrate him further. so he looked at them, admiring the solid black walnut, rustic, hand-hewn Trestle Dining tables. each piece was magically engraved with blood magic on the undersides, which kept said tables in pristine condition. they are worth a fortune and the school was fortunate enough to have been given them by the founders of this school. the tables were laid with glittering golden plates and goblets that have yet to be decorated with food in an over the top manner, that Dumbledore has instructed the house elves to quote on quote 'wow the first years with.' Severus risked another glance at the hundreds of tiny faces seated at their tables and noticed they almost looked like pale lanterns beneath the flickering candlelight.

 

 

a few second years were watching the velvety black ceiling dotted with stars. they were all so young, so innocent. completely unaware of the upcoming war they would be unwillingly caught up in. Severus pursed his lips and sighed, already missing the peace that would leave Hogwarts the moment Harry Potter arrives. at least he wasn't frustrated anymore.. glancing back at the rest of the faculty members, he noticed Minnie had gone missing. to fetch the first years he presumed. one of those first years would be Harry Potter. Lily's son.. he shut his eyes again, and hoped to Merlin that the boy took more after Lily in appearance and personality.. his heart wouldn't be able to take it if a miniature James Potter walked through those doors promising years of cruel pranks. but it would make it so much easier to hate the boy, which he needed to openly do in order to remain in the dark lord's good graces.

 

 

The sound of the large doors across the dining hall began to creak open, and Severus sat up. his cauldron stained fingertips coming to a close as they drifted mere inches over his chin as he watched the first years walk towards the front in a single file line. 'this is it.' he thought. among the row of children, a pair of unnaturally bright, killing curse green eye's caught his attention, for they stood out the most under the flickering candle light. that same pair locked onto his own charcoal black, and the world seemed to still. the girl had raven black, long layered spiked bangs framing her small porcelain white face, the far ends reaching the child's knees in length perhaps, the ends fastened in green ribbons. Severus noticed the girl was wearing a high bun fastened with a Slytherin green ribbon? maybe?

 

 

the sudden long shadow swaying behind the girl revealed it to be a very long ponytail instead. one that would touch the ground if taken down. how unhygienic, but with the almost constant state of his hair he wouldn't say anything. she had to be the first, first-year student he's seen charm makeup on herself quite like that. the concentration and detail that goes into layering charms together in such a way were not something the first-year students could successfully perform, it was impressive and spoke volumes of the child's pureblood upbringing, and strict training regimens. there was no other explanation as to why there were at least thirty strongly cast charms on each eye (if you knew what to look for). such a promising student among a row of dunderheads this year. 

 

 

a little green eyed girl with a knack for charms... his heart began to ache at the similarities between this girl and Lily and hoped she would be in Slytherin so he wouldn't have to act so cruelly towards her like he did with children in houses aside Slytherin. that green gaze continued to wander his face with a soft smile on her lips, and then to the ceiling and his own trailed down the line of first years walking further into the dining hall, hoping to spot Lily's son. Stifled giggles and laughter began to fill the hall. what was so funny? A familiar head of platinum blonde hair caught his attention and was.. was that a penis? Did Draco have a glittery pink penis doodled on his forehead!? damn it all, and the boy seemed to be completely oblivious to its existence. Severus was extremely disappointed in Minnie for leaving it there when she could have removed it before she decided to lead the first years into the dining hall. he knew that Slytherins weren't well liked or even tended to as much as the other houses by his fellow professors but this was ridiculous! the child hadn't even been sorted into a house yet! granted, all Malfoy children turned out a Slytherin, but it did not excuse the woman... allowing a child! a young child! to be shamed in such a way...

 

Severus pulled out his wand, his cheeks tinted red and pointed it at Draco the moment the boy stood not too far from the stool beside the other children. with the glittering Penis on Draco's head spelled away, had Minerva pulled a scroll from within the sleeve of her robe, looking far too smug for his liking. Minerva cleared her throat, as she stood beside the stool with the Sorting hat tucked under an arm. after a few moments, she schooled her features and said. "When I call your name-" Flitwick had fallen out of his seat, his loud laughter echoing throughout the hall, followed by the Weasely twins and lastly the rest of the hall. Draco, Harry, Hermoine, Neville, Dumbledore, Minerva, and Severus were the only ones who did not laugh. but Minerva was close. for Harry and Hermoine, they didn't laugh because the joke got old after eleven hours of sharing a train compartment with the prick with the glittery dick on his head. 


	22. Flashback within a flashback within a flashback, violent farts and then some. part 1 of 3.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so here's what bothers me. everytime shit hits the fan on the Hogwarts Express, where are all the people who work on the train? I would imagine there would be a few staff members aboard the express helping Muggle-borns who have never taken the train before with their luggage and animals at the start too. you know? So I made at least two, two is a decent number. three if you count the old lady pushing a cart of sweets up and down the aisle. Four because of the conductor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Breaking it into two parts again because it's a lot and I need to finish editing the second half which is even longer than this half. I just had to get something out this week and I can admit I was taking a tad too long with editing it. <:p

***Flashback.*****

 

The train gave sway and rocked as it traveled through thick woods of unknown origin to those of both the muggle and most of the wizarding world, save for Dumbledore and his staff who are under oath not to reveal its location. to everyone else, only the destination was certain, the reasoning behind such secrecy because the Headmaster promised protection for both Hogwarts and its many students. the thundering of the train's wheels on the Hogwarts express having gone under a special silencing charm, and a Fidelius charm one might find on a heavily warded estate in the wizarding world. these were also placed on the train and its tracks on a grand scale to prevent detection. 

 

The book, Hogwarts: a history having mentioned them being put in place after a dangerous feud between two pureblood houses got so bad that one of the families decided to lay in wait on the tracks of the Hogwarts Express to kidnap the child of their nemesis on the way to school. The child was never found, and it was never proven who the culprit was, but it was enough for the headmaster of the time to create and enforce safety measures, ensuring nothing like that would ever happen again. 

 

Or so Hermoine Granger just finished reading about, only to lick her thumb and flip over to the next page of her boarding school's oversized history book. it's weight reduced to a feather under a feather charm she read about in one of her first-year textbooks and had mastered in only three days after discovering it. Her eye's narrowed at the familiar known as 'Kitty', who was sitting beside Hermoine with enlarged pupils, attempting to bap at each page Hermoine flipped with a paw, thinking it was some sort of game. Her loud purring and the heart shaped spot on the cat's nose melting the girl's heart on the spot and thus erasing any complaints Miss Granger might have thought about making regarding Mandy's familiar. 

 

The cart swayed a bit too hard when making a sharp turn along the tracks, causing the unconscious, platinum blonde haired boy resting across from them to nearly fall face first on the floor, if not for Mandy having shoved his boot against the rolling boy's shoulder for the entirety of the sharp turn. During the sleeping boy's roll, his head slanted outward facing them, showing off a sparkling pink doodle of the male genitalia. It had shocked Hermoine at first and warmed her cheeks to have seen it but after hearing why it was given did the witch decide it was well deserved. at least for another hour or so, then she would pester the boy who put it there to take it off. it would be cruel to leave it there any longer than that. but for now it would stay, for the door's curtains were draped over the window and it didn't seem like anyone else was going to come wandering in here and see the graffiti, or so Mandy had persuaded her, adding that there wasn't a rule about putting graffiti on other people riding the train. just the train itself. 

 

She watched Mandy turn the boy back around to face the wall while giggling. Hermoine couldn't help but giggle too. the whole situation was too ridiculous not to find comical, and she was only a child. she could have this, or so Mandy told her sagely. the moment she showed just how bad she felt for laughing, that is. the boy was strange, but then again so was the wizarding world and she was equally as thrilled to learn more about both the boy and this new magical way of life. Kitty jumped on Mandy's lap the moment the boy sat back down, purring at the soothing scratches her kitty ears started to receive. 

 

Hermoine rubbed at the bump on her head absentmindedly, thankful for painkillers Mandy had given her thirty minutes ago, as they were finally starting to kick in. Today was starting to become one of those long days ranging from discovering the secret behind the platform of nine and three quarters this morning, that took thirty minutes, by the way, to having finally got inside after a magical family showed up with their child who was also attending Hogwarts, visually teaching her how to get there by pushing her luggage cart through a section of the brick wall at the train station. before performing such a feat, she kissed her parent's goodbye, promising to write to them about as often as she could. her father shouting after her to make them proud. then...well, that's when things started to get a bit crazy. 

****Flashback within a flashback.******

 

Upon entering the correct station, she found herself surrounded by wizarding families and their children. not many had arrived since the express wouldn't take off for at least forty more minutes, and it upset her greatly that she wasn't as early as she would have of liked to be but a little happier that she wasn't having to stand behind a crowd of children surrounding the doors who would undoubtedly obtain the best cart on the train if they had (If there was one.) and that was probably at the front. in the meantime, she cast a feather charm on her luggage and stifled giggles at the reactions of several children around her who probably thought she was strong as an ox if their gaping mouths were any sign of how they felt about an eleven-year-old hoisting luggage bigger than her body over her head and into the train's side chamber. Crookshanks meowed from his kennel which remained in the luggage cart, causing Hermoine to smile afore she pushed it off to the side for a second. what remained inside the luggage cart was both Crookshank's and one carrying case she planned taking on the train, for the case held a plethora of books she was going to read during a VERY long train ride that she read would take place in the history of Hogwarts. she cast feather charms on the kennel and traveling case before moving to stand in front of the doors with everyone else, the handles of both carrying cases gripped in the palms of her hands. she felt nervous, and the odd looks she received from others along with the occasional haughty sniffs from wizards in overly outdated clothes (From a muggle's viewpoint, developed from having been raised around them.) passing her by didn't help matters. her toes curled inside her converse shoes, as she bit her bottom lip. just what evoked that sort of reaction from those few around her? it wasn't like what she was wearing was undignified. (If only she knew.)

 

Hermoine wore a sleeveless, soft charcoal romper, with an elastic soft waistband, slanted pockets and wide cuffs at the hem. a dark Gray hoodie that matched the color of her shoes being zipped up half way over her one piece garment. she decided to look around, her gaze lingering on a boy with the whitest blonde hair she's ever seen standing with a beautiful man who's long hair was the same shade, and grazed over the back of his shoulders. the two were clearly family. the boy felt her gaze and caught her staring with repulsion working its way across his somewhat pointed facial features, which caused her to look away with burning cheeks. 'He must think I'm a creep. rightfully so, I was staring so hard at him..' 

 

The chill of the morning air caressed her knuckles as she waited patiently for the train doors to open, following the loops of her shoe laces to pass the time. the light scent of red roses caused her to look up just in time to see an aberrantly dressed boy pass her by, one with extremely long raven black hair that nearly tinted blue under the early morning light. the greenest eyes which almost took a glowing tinge shadowed beneath a fancy cap looked back at her, the knit around his neck obscuring the lower half of his face from view, hiding just about every distinguishing feature he had, save for his layered bangs which framed his face and those piercing jade eyes.. the book, Cinderella was clutched almost protectively to his chest. he had no luggage with him, wich told Hermoine that he must have put everything away on the train. it was a dumb move because the train ride would carry on into the late evening. He was just going to get bored after having re-read that fairy tale more than twice. 

 

He walked on, diverting his eye's the moment he passed, and Hermoine couldn't help but watch the sway of his ponytail as he left. her eyebrows disappearing into her hairline once she realized a cat was around his neck too, blending in with the white knit as if it were apart of it. it was magnificent, his hair and she couldn't help but feel a little envious what with the constant frizzy state of her own. A croak brought her from her musings, her wild curls giving a sway of their own when spotting a fair skinned, blonde haired boy chasing a slimy toad around the train's platform. "Trevor, come back!" before she could attempt to offer her assistance, the doors of the train opened, and the toad leaped inside. the little boy hot on its trail, shouting after it. Hermoine sighed and followed after him.'so much for finding the perfect cart.' or so she thought, before being interrupted by a tall man with a powerful square jawline who smelled strongly of aftershave, Hermione tilted her head at the heavily outdated train station uniform when he stopped her. his voice was deep but not unkind, as he asked if it would be alright for him to place her cat in a special compartment along with all the other familiars, giving her the option to take her cat with her into the train compartment she chose if she wished. Hermoine glanced up at the middle-aged man, noticing his bright blue eye's crinkling at their corners. his short, mocha blonde curls stuck out wildly from under the hat that came with his uniform and bobbed his pause. 

 

Hermoine smiled and handed off her cat to him willingly. "Thank you, it's my first time riding the express." The man only nodded, reaching for the kennel. "I'll be back for you soon, Crookshanks." She called out, as the man left her, receiving a crestfallen meow in return, causing the man to raise the front of the cage to his face and send the feline soft promises of everything being ok, and how a nice bowl of dried food was waiting for him with the other animals, as he walked further down the aisle of the train. she smiled briefly at the man's back, before glancing around the inside of the train. sliding open the first compartment she laid her eye's on, she found it was empty, much to her relief and proceeded to shove her suitcase up onto the rack, using one of the seats to give her a boost. popping it open just a smidge, did she pull out a neatly folded robe and plop in down on the seat. once closing and shoving her traveling case further back onto the rack did she step down from the seat, and move to close the compartment door and its curtains so she could change into her Hogwarts uniform. she didn't want to forget, not that she would, but she wanted to be prepared, what awaited her later this evening only fueling the fire to her appropriate child- like excitement and the inability to wait until she was nearly there to start getting changed. "Trevor!" Hermoine heard from just outside the compartment. she sighed, and slid open the door after a few seconds, having finished folding her casual clothes and setting them aside. stepping out of her claimed compartment, did she see the back of the distressed boy from before heading into the next train cart, presumably after his toad. like a good Samaritan did she chase after the boy in hopes of helping him find his familiar. she was nearly there when a loud slam and distressed cry sounding as if it had come from the same boy gave her pause. she quickened her pace, hoping nothing too bad had happened to him. 

 

Sliding open the door leading into the next train cart, did two intimidating boys who tower over her in height hog the doorway with their large frames which caused her to take a few steps back. Hermoine's pulse began to quicken, as they sneered down at her. "Move." one of them spoke, shoving her out of the way harshly before she could respond. her shoulder slammed against the door of a closed compartment, followed by the side of her head which made her wince and the door rattled from the impact. brief moisture was forced from the corners of her eyes from hitting the door so roughly, and she knelt on the ground after they passed, reaching up to rub what was sure to turn into a large fresh bump on the left side of her head. those scoundrels must have done the same thing to that boy to make him cry out in such a way. before she could move, the same man who had helped her with her cat rushed passed her, seeming to have witnessed the entire thing and hollered out. "Hey, you two boys! you come with me right now! you are going to be sitting in a compartment farthest from the others for starting trouble!" The look of surprise and worry flashing across the faces of the brutes was well deserved in Hermoine's opinion, as she watched them wince and get hauled off by their ears into the compartment they just came from. 

 

Hermoine got off the floor and was immediately met with what was sure to become a migraine. she heard a croak by her foot and nearly jumped out of her skin with a slight gasp at how sudden it was. She knelt to pick up the toad with a grimace and decided to go search for the boy who lost this familiar. but perhaps it might be a good idea to seal it in something before she did, for toads often urinated on the hands of strangers. but what? She walked down the aisle, mindful of the toad's anus, and spot an empty cookie box in the garbage bin and smiled. "Perfect." Setting the docile toad on the ground, did she lower her knee on it's back gently to keep it in place as she took the box out of the trash. opening it up, did she put the toad inside and close the lid. it was one of those boxes with a clear plastic cover on the front so one could see what flavors of sweets lay inside. using her finger did she push-in holes on the side since the walls held the same density of a tissue box. Satisfied with her work, did she turn around and head into the compartment she watched the boy go through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, the two boys who slammed into Hermione were Crabbe and Goyle, probably looking for Draco too since the blonde didn't meet up with them on the cart first thing, this time around.


	23. Flashback within a flashback within a flashback, violent farts and then some. part 2 of 3.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm changing it to three parts, oh. you know what. no, it's taking me forever to edit because I was high as shit when I wrote such a long chapter and can't understand some of it but can get the gist of what I was trying to say during those loopy moments. it is difficult going back to re word and fix things and will take some time. but the next chapter will definitely be the end of all flashbacks. when it comes out.

With the box held in both unkempt hands, did Hermoine's wild curls bob from left to right while moving down the aisle from inside the next train cart, the sounds of her converse shoes crunching over a moderately rugged carpet reaching her ears along with the distant thundering of the train's wheels rolling across the train tracks. There were many train compartments, children inside each one, but none holding the little blonde boy spouting off in fits of hysterics over the whereabouts of his toad. Passing a broom closet, did her eyes roam over the metal plate positioned and bolted down beside the door which read. 'Employee's only.' Hermoine reached for the handle with a clammy hand. her gut was telling her to peek inside, but her high respect for authority and for the many rules set in place by its authoritative figures bringing her fingers to a still. instead, she let them linger on the gold, chipped paint coating the knob. 'If I open the door, and he's not inside then I could get into some serious trouble if someone catches me... but then again, the boy's scream was pretty close by. he could be in here.' 

Brief flashes of the man who dragged those two bullies away by the ear crossed her mind and she brought her outstretched hand back to the side of the box. 'I'm sure someone who works on the train helped the boy, and if not...I can always ask an adult for help or to check the broom closet for me.' or so Hermoine thought with a nod, satisfied with her final decision. The train's staff were helpful enough during her previous encounters with one. Hermoine turned away from the broom closet, treading further down the aisle with high hopes of running into one of the staff members, maybe even a prefect or the same employee that helped her with Crookshanks before. she could pass him the blonde boy's Familiar. 'He'll keep the little guy from running off.' looking back down at the Toad, she wrinkled her nose. it was sitting in a puddle of its own pee! Hermione sure was glad to have thought of placing the familiar into a box instead of choosing to carry it with her bare hands. 

Hermoine slipped into the next compartment, the door sliding shut behind her with a small click, completely unaware of the unconscious blonde boy in the broom closet she had walked away from. the boy in question had a bruise the size of an apple on the underside of his jaw, his arse stuck in a yellow bucket of filthy mop water. Hermoine managed to find the same man from before and handed over the Toad. he commended her for such a crafty idea in capturing the little guy when looking at the urine it sat in, to which Hermoine beamed at the compliment directed at her creativity. Hermoine then went on to mention her concern over the blonde boy's whereabouts, and that she heard him scream a few carts back. The man looked doubtful but assured the little girl that he'd look into it after placing the Toad in a nice clean cage alongside the other familiars. 

 

***************************************************************

Walking back to her claimed compartment, did she notice from the windows of the other compartments that they were packed full of at least six to seven children when they were built to hold six. Hermoine hoped that her compartment hadn't become that full, but it was a possibility. standing in front of it, noting the curtains were still down did she hear several young voices coming from the other side and took a deep breath, preparing for the worst. she slid open the cart. there were six boys inside, all rambunctious first-year boys by the looks of it, who were acting like a bunch of wild fourth graders on the back of a Muggle school bus. one boy squawked randomly, and another was laying sprawled out on the laps of three other little boys which told Hermoine the group must have been tight-knit or very close friends if they were invading each others space like that.

 

one smirked and pushed the sprawled out boy on the floor, only for the once sprawled out boy to scream with a manic smile on his face during the tumble. Hermoine didn't think she'd get a chance to read any of her books in this crowded compartment full of rowdy boys. clearing her throat she caught their attention. "Excuse me, would you lot mind handing me my suitcase from the rack up there?" or so she asked politely, pointing up at the rack where her suitcase sat. The smallest boy nodded with a cheeky grin, and stood up on the seat, his rumpus incidentally angled towards the face of the boy he was once sitting beside. said boy wrinkled his nose out of disgust from having a butt in his face, and pulled a magazine out of the fingers of another boy across from him who only arched a brow, THAT boy just sat there watching the snatcher of his reading material snap the flimsy thing shut and use its flat surface to slap across the standing boy's posterior. 

 

the loud smack almost sounded like a wet fart, and everyone quieted down, only to burst out into a fit of laughter. Hermoine couldn't help but cover her mouth and laugh a little bit too, despite trying to be the mature one here. the boy squawked when smacked, nearly dropping the suitcase when pulling it down, but was immediately met with help by two other children who rose out of their seats to raise their hands and steady the bulky feather charmed case above their heads, who by the way, looked surprised at the weight of the charmed object. clearly, they were expecting it to be much heavier. Hermoine smirked, feeling accomplished for having been clever enough to cast such a charm before most first years could even do it. 

 

with the suitcase successfully pulled down, did they hand it off to Hermoine. the young girl thanked the boys kindly for helping her, and the boy who remained standing nodded, smirked and pushed his rump back against the face of the boy who had to swat him across the arse, earning himself an outraged shout of protest in return after a loud fart slipped from between the standing boy's arse cheeks. Hermoine turned around with a huff, leaving the boys to their shenanigans with a small disappointed sigh. The Hogwarts express wasn't what she envisioned and the very distant past daydream she held of reading her books in the best compartment, sipping a cup of hot tea by her lonesome with Crookshanks curled into a ball by her feet was waning. all she wanted to do now was find a compartment with well-behaved children in it, who weren't as boisterous as the boys she recently encountered. 

 

Hermoine spent the next fifteen minutes looking around the train for a place to sit when she heard an unusual pitch of cackling from one of the carts, its curtains closed. her curiosity was peaked when she realized it was only one person's cackle instead of several. Hermoine couldn't help but feel a little giddy, thinking she might just get that peace and quiet after all. Standing in front of the compartment did she slide open the door, her face flushing a bright scarlet at what she had just walked in to see, her mouth agape. The frizzy-haired bookworm dropped her suitcase, slapping her hands over her face to hide her reddened cheeks. that aberrantly dressed boy from before was kneeling in front of a sleeping platinum blonde, the one with pointed features who caught her staring earlier. but that wasn't exactly the problem, no. the problem was, that the strange, jade green-eyed boy was adding a few random glittery lines on a crudely drawn glittery penis doodled on the slumbering boy's forehead. a white cat was shaping the blonde's hair into a bird's nest with its tongue. The cat's loud rumbling purr decreased when its nose was buried in the hair, only to intensify nearing the end of each drawn out lick. Harry and Kitty paused in their endeavors of mischief-making to look up at the intruder, both with enlarged pupils, just in time for Hermoine's suitcase to burst open, her books spilling onto the ground inside the train compartment. 

 

Hermoine had doubled over, her shoulders shaking. Harry shot up, slightly panicked from having been caught red-handed, then concerned at just how hard he assumed Hermoine was taking this. 'I know she was crazy about the rules, but damn.' or so he thought, as he cautiously places a palm on her shoulder, offering a comforting squeeze. with the softest expression and voice he could muster did he say. "Hey, it's just a penis, chill." Hermoine took a step inside the compartment, forgetting about the books littering the floor of said compartment, and tripped over them, Harry's eye's widening all the while, reaching out to catch her with the speed of a seeker after a snitch. unfortunately, with the built-up momentum being as swift as it was plus the added force behind her fall sent them both stumbling and crashing hard against the floor. Harry grit his teeth from under her, wincing from the hard blow to his chest that was Hermoine slamming against it. The girl was laughing loudly, or so Harry finally noticed after his brain came back down from a dizzying whirl, his shiny black ponytail not too far behind. propping himself up on an elbow did Harry smile lazy at her, his opposing arm remaining around the shoulder of the giggling girl.' I knew she had a sense of humor!' Harry thought, before a loud wolf whistle coming from that same cart of girls across from his caught his attention. cursing under his breath did Harry slide the door closed with his foot. 

 

Harry lets his head fall back down on the tufted carpet with a thud. 'I'm just glad Snape sempai isn't riding on the train with us, I wouldn't want him getting the wrong idea..' or so he thought, knowing full well man didn't know him well enough to even care yet but buried those thoughts because he would soon if Harry had anything to say about it. He smirked up at Hermoine who was no longer laughing and even redder in the face than before once she realized she was practically straddling him. "I-i-i'm so sorry!" Hermoine shouted, getting up and off of Harry as fast as she could to kneel and gather her books.

 

Hermoine's mind was running a mile a minute, her face flushed out of having embarrassed herself so badly, for having laughed at something so juvenile.'I'm supposed to be the mature one here!' were one out of several haughty thoughts. Harry sat up and began to help the bushy-haired girl pick up her books, letting a few giggles leave him. once each was gathered, did Hermoine put them in the suitcase she brought, and shove the feather charmed case onto the rack. Harry stood up, dusting himself off and plopped down on the bench across from the Malfoy heir and Kitty who was still munching away quite happily on Draco's hair. Hermoine stood up on the bench beside Harry making sure her books were in order before steadily bringing herself down to sit. she was biting her bottom lip, trying to fight off snickers, her eyes wandering over at the blonde. she looked as if she felt guilty for it all at the same time, too, laughing at Draco's misfortune. she wanted to question the mysterious boy with the knit obscuring half his face, but she didn't trust herself not to laugh the moment she opened her mouth. 

 

She noticed a black wand rolling across the floor of the compartment and bent down to pick it up. all traces of humor left her face the moment her fingers brushed across its smooth wood finish. she cast a curious glance at Harry who only twirled a lock of his hair around a finger, staring off into space. "Leaving your wand on the floor isn't a smart thing to do, someone could have easily stepped on it, snapping it in half." or so she said as if scolding a small child. The strange boy remained indifferent, paying the girl no mind, which ticked said girl off. her eyes wandered over to the blonde boy again, immediately looking away while fighting a smile. a small giggle left her, which caused Harry to roll his eyes over to look at her then. To Harry, Hermoine seemed to wear her emotions on her sleeve, going from ashamed to amused to serious on and off again.'I wonder if she's on her period or something..' or so he pondered, afore shrugging and said. "Hey, he attacked me,"

 

"He attacked you?! you should have told someone! not.." she paused during what was the beginning of her rant, appearing exasperated as she shut her eyes, pinched the bridge of her nose and let out a sigh. It was as if everyone her age was reminding her constantly today the very reason she chose to avoid them like the plague. "Even if he did, that's no reason to-" She snickered again, trying really hard to force a straight face, opening her brown eyes to glare at the ravenette and point at the sleeping boy. "To do that to him!" her voice cracked during her struggle to act ages above her own, trying to appear furious at the boy who appeared unconcerned about the whole fiasco. Harry grinned a wide sly grin which was hidden by his knit, leaning into Hermoine's personal space, his long silky high ponytail brushing over a shoulder. Hermoine backed up a bit. she didn't like the mischievous look he was giving her and felt nervous looking into those unnatural glowing jade green eyes. unknown to her, Harry had recently cast a none verbal glamor charm on them when she had closed her eyes, giving his own a glowing tint. A quick trick that varied from slits to a forked tongue that rattled with a hiss or sharpened teeth to give a more dramatic effect in whatever it was he wanted to say sometimes to what was left the Dursleys. "You liked it, otherwise, you wouldn't be laughing." Hermoine narrowed her eyes at the boy who was now, thankfully backing out of her space. she placed her hands on the top of her knees, giving them a tense squeeze. "I know, and I instantly regret laughing. it's just the ridiculousness of the situation that struck me as-" Harry held up a hand, stopping the girl from explaining herself. Harry noted that that right there was a sign Hermoine had long ways to go before she grew into the young woman he remembered watching as Mandy on the big screen. Hermione scowled at him for cutting her off in such a way but before she could open her mouth, did the unnerving boy continue with "I understand, you don't have to explain." he paused again, as his eyes twinkled at her this time which gave her pause. "You seem like a sweet girl, otherwise you wouldn't have felt so bad for laughing at dickhead over there." Harry's eyes flickered from Draco to Hermoine. "but in our defense, we're young. we are allowed to be immature twats, we can have things like this every once and a while. though..." he paused yet again, reaching up to rub the back of his neck, looking up at Hermoine's luggage."I think you deserve to know the story behind the glittery penis, seeing as how you will be sharing a compartment with me." Hermoine's eyes rolled over to where the blonde was lying, eying the cat's heart freckled nose that was nose deep in that wild blonde hair. the cat's dilated pupils were wide as large saucers. Hermoine couldn't help but bite her lip to stifle the giggles that threatened to escape her at the sight. The boy wasn't completely wrong, but they were going to a prestigious school and needed to act better than this. or so she thought, but everytime her eyes landed on the glittery penis, she wanted to laugh. a mix of a sigh and giggle later, Hermoine let caution blow to the wind, allowing herself to laugh, a dimple making itself known on her left cheek and Harry thought that Hermoine really did look beautiful when she laughed and that Ron was going to be a very lucky man one day. "Yes, I think I do." Hermoine finished, settling down and leaning against the seat. 

And so Harry explained what happened, along with the reasoning behind the penis doodle only for Hermoine to scowl at Harry and demand that he remove it immediately or she would tell on him for assaulting another student, to which Harry argued that it was self-defense and well-deserved justice that followed the blonde prat, adding that if she tattled on him then he would tattle on her for sexual harassment. "But when I fell on top of you, it was an accident!" Hermoine shouted, nearly red in the face from both out of embarrassment when remembering the incident to the anger building within her right now, now that she knew the boy would lie in such a horrible way to get her in trouble. Harry got up and drew back the curtains of their compartment, pointing at the giggling girls who were now looking in at them curiously from their own compartment. "It didn't look that way to those who witnessed it." Hermoine bit her lip, glaring up at Harry because as much as she hated to admit it, he had her. she was about to call him a terrible person, and a lair, but wavered the moment she noticed the pupils of his eyes were black slits. 'How is he doing that?!' she screamed within the confounds of her mind. the boy let the curtains drop back down and stalked closer to Hermoine to which she looked up defiantly at him, unwilling to cower despite how much she wanted to right now. "I'll tell you what, girly. since I'm in such a good mood, I promise I'll remove the dick in an hour. sound good?" 

Hermoine only blinked. that was... unexpected. this boy was not only strange but confusing, but the fact he was choosing to bargain with her told Hermoine she still had some sort of control here which eased her building anxiety. begrudgingly, she agreed with a curt nod, feeling as if the boy would make her train ride difficult if she argued further, adding that keeping it there any longer than that would be cruel. Hermoine could feel the tension between them, almost as if the fog rolling off the mountains they were passing rolled in thick swirls inside their shared compartment. twenty minutes passed, and Hermoine could no longer take it, deciding to try and break the ice between them, at least until they reached Hogwarts. that and because the boy no longer had slits where his pupils used to be which made him far less intimidating than he was... "I'm Hermoine Granger, and you are?" The frizzy girl asked haughtily, with her nose in the air, reaching out in an attempt to shake the boy's hand. Harry took her hand and tilted it gently, leaning to place a masked kiss across the air of the muggle-born's knuckles. this made Hermoine blush furiously, mostly because she was not expecting that at all. "Mandy Mathews, it is a pleasure to meet you, Granger." the boy murmured, releasing her hand. Hermoine raised it to cough over her clenched fist in an attempt to poorly mask her stutter. "S-so, I noticed you like fairy tales." Mandy could see how he'd embarrassed the girl, and grinned. "Oh yeah, Cinderella is my favorite. right up there next to sleeping beauty, how about you?" Hermoine smiled a little, and the two of them started to ease into a frivolous conversation about Fairy tales and then Muggle-born literature. after a while, there was no longer tension built between them and Hermoine couldn't help but think the strange boy couldn't be all that bad, seeing as how he's as much into books as she was. 

 

At some point during their conversation Mandy noticed Hermoine's mild discomfort and narrowed his eye's at her, leaning into her personal space yet again whilst bringing his thumb under his chin, his index finger brushing over the front to give it a light pinch. "Hey, what's with that look?" he aske raising a brow. Hermoine eyed the strange boy curiously, choosing to accept the invasion of space for now labeling it a quirk of his, but before she could answer she watched him swiftly back out of her bubble and lift his arm to take a sniff under his armpit, asking rather dramatically if he offended her with a forlorn look in his eyes. she couldn't help but laugh, and shake her head, waving her hand dismissively at boy's ridiculous theatrics. "It's only a headache." Harry let out a relieved sigh, making Hermoine chuckle again as she watched him pull what looked like a hot pink ring box coated in glitter from his pocket. Hermoine couldn't help but squint, and glanced at her new sort of friend? acquaintance? she didn't really know what this boy was to her yet. Pursing her lips, Hermoine wondered if she dared to wonder what his state of mind might be like. but that outlook shifted back into neutral territory, jealousy, then awe when the sparkling box started to grow, taking up the shape of a heavy wooden chest spray painted with a hot pink veneer of glitter. 

Mandy let it fall on the floor of the compartment with a light thud, and Hermoine figured it must have been feather charmed. Harry dropped to his knees in front of it and clicked the glittering chest open. the sweet scent of roses and various fruits filling their shared compartment, but not overwhelmingly so. "How did you do that?" Hermoine asked from behind the boy, curiosity getting the better of her as she peeked over his shoulder. inside the chest were several small boxes, and a plethora of bath bombs in a decoratively woven basket strapped down by pieces of pink fishnet bolted into the corners of the chest, as well as many other fancy labeled toiletries in unique little glass bottles shaped like diamonds and hearts. none of the smells emanating from the chest made her headache worse, which spoke volumes about the high-quality ingredients in the products the boy owned. Mandy only giggled, turning around to wiggle his fingers at the girl. "Magic!" Hermoine huffed, dropping to her knees beside the boy on the ground and said. "Obviously, but what spell did you use to shrink your luggage?" Mandy only smiled, brushing his manicured fingertips over the bottles fastened to the underside of the lid with light pink fishnet pockets held up by rose accented gold buttons around each pouch, his eyes moving along each. "A charm from one of my deceased mother's old Hogwarts textbooks, one of her fourth-year books I believe," Mandy replied fondly, remembering that warm fuzzy feeling he got in his chest when tracing the notes with a finger, that Snape himself had left in the book for Lily, the first time he discovered the book and flipped through its pages. Snape had signed his signature on the back too, along with a heartfelt note that made Mandy jealous each time he read it but at the same time proved who's handwriting it was. but then Mandy remembered that Lily was dead and felt ridiculous for getting worked up over someone who'd never compete with him for Severus's affections even if the woman was still alive today, which she wasn't. Lily loved James, which was horseshit if you asked Mandy. Snape was obviously the better choice! who wouldn't want a bad boy with a softer side?! those are like, impossible to find! 

 

Mandy shook himself from his thoughts and said. "I'll lend it to you sometime if you promise to be careful wi- oh my god.." It was Mandy's turn to flush bright red, for Hermoine held a long, eight-inch curved wooden dildo that resembled the bulky tip of a bedpost in her hand, eying it curiously. "What an odd-looking wand, I don't think I've ever seen one this thick before." Mandy was thankful the knit around his face masked his mortified expression. he bit his bottom lip when Hermoine waved it around, trying not to laugh himself. "Er...well you see, that's my back up wand," Mandy stated, pointing a well-manicured finger in the air by his masked face, sounding very sure of himself. "Back up wand?" Hermoine questioned, raising a brow. Mandy nodded and took it from the girl gently, setting it back into the plush box from whence it came, shutting the lid. "Yes, my uncle Vermin was very insistent that I have a backup wand because he knows how easily I can lose my things sometimes." The corners of Mandy's eye's crinkled gesturing a smile, as he continued. "Why, my Uncle often tells me I'd forget my head if it wasn't attached to my shoulders." Hermoine chuckled, thinking that simple phrase 'Men' appearing satisfied with Mandy's answer, and Mandy could only thank whatever god was out there that Hermoine didn't open the bright blue box beside the one which held the wooden dildo... 

 

It would have been hard trying to explain a steel, battery-powered vibrating wand to her. "So what are you looking for exactly?" Mandy pulled a plastic bottle of Tylenol AM capsules from one of the side fishnet pouches, handing it off to Hermoine, who's expression softened when looking at the label. "You didn't have to do that..." Mandy only waved his free hand mere inches from his nose dismissively. "It's no trouble at all, just take two of these. Think of it as my apology for threatening you earlier." Hermoine only squinted at the ridiculousness of such a statement, chortled and then nodded, rising from the floor with the bottle in hand.'How can he be so mean but nice at the same time?' or so she thought, afore turning back to say "I'll be back." Mandy only nodded, turning back around to close the feather charmed wooden chest. the moment Hermoine was out of the train compartment, did Mandy belly flop over the hard surface of the chest, his ponytail whipping up and over it to graze the rough tuft of carpet. 'Crisis averted!' After a few more seconds, Mandy sat on his knees snapping the front clasps shut on the chest and shrunk it back down with a nonverbal 'Reducio' only to pick it up and put it back in one of his pockets. 

 

Plopping back down on the bench, he waited for Hermoine to get back with his nose stuck in the book he brought, having to re-read with the paragraph he was on twice because what the fuck."So troll urine can cancel out the explosion of any brewing potion...Huh." upon the girl's return, Hermoine had a bottle of pink lemonade in her hand. some of it gone from taking the pill, or so Harry assumed. The girl sat beside Harry, asking about the book containing information on the shrinking charm Harry used. Mandy just smiled at her, it was a very unpleasant smile he was happy to have hidden. Hermoine had a very greedy thirst for knowledge. he could use that greed against her, too. he could teach her a lot of neat spells, maybe threaten to pull the opportunity to learn them away from her with subtle manipulation and even go so far as to rip the knowledge of how to perform them from her mind with obliviate along with all the knowledge of her asking or even learning the spells if he wanted to. a simple rinse and repeat. He didn't want to use Obliviate on a child, but this one was too much of a lawful good. she could get in his way if he wasn't careful around her, likely to blab his wrongdoings to the old fart or a teacher. he couldn't have that. Harry pulled out another shrunken down chest, this one having been spray painted a glittering purple. restoring its full size and dropping to his knees much like before in front of it, had he unclasped the chest's metal catches to fetch the book for Hermoine. The girl was excited, as he placed the worn book in the girl's hands after a few seconds for the sake of creating a dramatic effect. With the girl enthralled with the book in her hands, Harry reached behind himself, pulling a long black pen from inside the chest and slid it into the sleeve of his shirt. he let it slip out halfway in front of Hermoine who's attention was now on him. "Thank you, Mandy, for letting me read this!" Harry nodded, aiming the tip of the pen at the chest, hoping to whatever god was out there that Hermoine would be too distracted by the wandless magic he was about to perform to notice he didn't have a wand at all. "Reducio!" Hermoine watched in wide-eyed wonder as the chest shrunk back down to the size of a ring box. Pocketing the chest, had Hermoine start to say. "I know how important this book is to you, knowing it was your mum so I promise to take good care of it and return it when I'm finished with it." Harry plopped back down on the bench beside her, stuffing the pen further down his sleeve, making sure she watched him put his fake wand away. "See that you do." Hermoine was practically beaming him, her outlook on the strange boy changing drastically over the course of a minute into something much nicer than before. 'Maybe he really could be my friend.' Hermoine opened the book with care, running her finger down the index and Harry just leaned back where he was seated and shut his eyes. 'I can't believe I fucking forgot to buy a wand!' Harry shouted internally, wondering what the hell he was going to do about that. 'I could always pick up a stick, and paint over it with nail polish... yeah.' it was all he had to work with at the moment and would have to work with until he could either slip away undetected to get one or wait until next year, hoping that no one would notice. he really hoped it would be that first one because as lovely as Hogwarts was sure to be, he didn't want to feel like a princess trapped in a castle...but then how would he get back inside Hogwarts if he managed to slip away?! 'It couldn't be too fucking hard... Filch is a squib, practically a Muggle, and I'm a full-fledged wizard with cunning! Why I bet I could slip around that ugly poop under a Disillusionment and silencing Charm! and Mrs. Norris?! pshh.. shit, I could just boop her nose with perfume on my finger and she wouldn't know where anyone is! Though I wouldn't be able to use that specific bottle of perfume without Filthy Filch or Norris finding out it's mine...but it was a sacrifice he was willing to make. yeah, this could work..' 

 

There was a comfortable silence between the two, as Hermoine read over that specific fourth-year charm, while Harry worried and schemed about what he could do about his little wand problem. he decided not to think more of it after seven minutes, having worked himself into a lather and decided to start instructing Hermoine on how to use the charm correctly for the next thirty minutes to take his mind off of the fact he had no wand. She was more than happy to receive a lesson, her head perking up from the book like his familiar Kitty did whenever he mentioned the word Food. using the pill bottle as a practice dummy, did he let the tip of the pen slide little ways out of his sleeve and began to instruct Hermoine. Harry applauded Hermoine's success after she finally managed to get the spell right after fifteen tries, and they both decided to take a break since Hermoine was starting to feel the magical strain. her core wasn't as big as his, so it was only expected she'd start to feel a bit tuckered out. Setting the book aside, Hermione rubbed her eyes, deciding aloud that she would finish re-reading Hogwarts a History, claiming she had only a few pages left and wanted to make sure she knew every rule by heart before she arrived at the school. Harry nodded, tucking away mother's book to the side and picked up his Potions book charmed to read Cinderella over the cover. They both forgot all about how Harry was supposed to remove the penis from Draco's forehead after an hour.

 

******End of Hermoine's and I guess some of Mandy's flashback too? you have two points of views here. just one more flashback to go, then we move on back to Hogwarts, and the reactions of several people, yada yada yada. snape. <3*******


	24. Update.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where the hell I have been.

My loyal viewers, hello!

I've been gone a month or two, I think, away from this story and many others on Hiatus due to the numerous difficulties going on in my life right now, mainly the one revolving around my medication. some of you who read my fics know it fucks up my ability to write properly, which is why I've been choosing not to post weekly like I have at the start of this fic. But now that I've switched doctors, I'm taking the right dosage of what I SHOULD have been taking and I'm no longer laying on my bean bag chair stoned out of my mind for hours at a time anymore because of it. I now feel confident enough to continue writing my stories without having to worry about butt loads of grammar errors that I would have undoubtedly made while still on my old meds. I also want to go back and correct my stories. I feel as if it is important that I do before I decide to add another chapter to this mediocre revenge on the Dursleys fic it kinda turned into. 

on another note, I've made up with one of my closest friends who messed up that one Naruto fic we both made and posted on here 'A somewhat better life' So expect that story to be completely rewritten at some point. (Don't ever ever ever ever ever allow someone to talk you into letting them put your work through complex sentence generator without looking into it first and then allowing them to post it up on here. WHAT COMES OUT OF THAT THING ISN'T PRETTY.) 

 

Hmm... what else.. OH YES. I changed my account name because I'm a little immature and love inappropriate humor. It might change again in a few months, back to what it was once the inside joke that is my new username slash gif picture is no longer funny to me. that's pretty much it. The other fanfictions I'm working on will be updated pretty regularly now too, but at random. 'Fuck this shit' and 'A somewhat better life are what I will be focusing on the most.' 

 

This update will be replaced by a chapter when the story as a whole is finished being edited enough to my liking.


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